The AHS: Freak Show Character You Are Based On Your Zodiac Sign
There's nothing quite like "American Horror Story." Blending big scares with dark humor, the hit anthology series explores America's love of horror stories as only Ryan Murphy and Brad Falchuk can. The true magic of the show is that it never takes itself too seriously, giddily subverting tropes and keeping viewers guessing season after season.
Over the course of its run, "American Horror Story" has played around in almost every corner of American horror mythology, from summer camp serial killers to government conspiracy theories. While it's not the most universally acclaimed installment, "Freak Show" still has plenty of fans thanks to its creepy carnival energy and gorgeous costume design.
With a colorful cast of characters played against a nostalgic 1950s palette, the fourth season of "American Horror Story" is one of the most fun to watch. If you've ever wondered where you would fit into the carnival world, we've got you covered. Read on to find out which "Freak Show" character you are based on your zodiac sign.
Aries: Desiree Dupree
If you're a spring baby with a birthday that falls somewhere between March 21 and April 19, it's time to break out your hottest outfit, because you bring the fire wherever you go. As an Aries, the "American Horror Story: Freak Show" character you will most strongly identify with is undoubtedly Desiree Dupree (Angela Bassett). Raised as a boy until puberty hit, this dreamy dame wouldn't discover the truth about her biological sex until well into adulthood, when she learned that her body had compensated for extra testosterone with a hefty kick of estrogen. Fiercely independent, Desiree handles the many curveballs life throws her with grace and dignity. But, although she's a sensual beauty, Desiree's confidence is her most attractive trait.
Desiree draws strength from her profound relationships with other women, especially her dear friend Ethel Darling. A born leader, she inspires those around her to action, taking revenge against Penny's father for mutilating her with tattoo ink (an act that transformed her from a lovely candy striper into the Astounding Lizard Girl). A fire sign through and through, Desiree can be a bit temperamental and headstrong at times, but she has to be in the world of 1950s Jupiter, where women have to fight for every bit of independence and autonomy.
Taurus: Ethel Darling
If you were born between April 20 and May 20, your "Freak Show" character is Ethel Darling (Kathy Bates). Like all the women in Fräulein Elsa's Cabinet of Curiosities, Ethel has faced her share of struggles in life. She initially found success on her own in the freak show biz, but things started going downhill for the Bearded Lady when she got herself caught in a bad romance with Stupendous Strongman Dell Toledo. When their son Jimmy was born with ectrodactyly and Dell tried to kill the poor infant, Ethel finally mustered her strength and left him.
Like all Tauruses, Ethel is made of stern stuff, holding up well in the face of adversity. Despite the many challenges she faced, she remained a dependable friend to those around her, only turning her back on Elsa when she suspected the ringleader of plotting to kill twins Dot and Bette. At Ethel's funeral, Desiree's heartfelt words rang out, describing her friend as "tough" and "funny."
Gemini: Ma Petite
As a Gemini with a birthdate landing somewhere between May 21 and June 20, you will identify with the lovely, diminutive Ma Petite (Jyoti Amge). The world's shortest lady, Ma Petite first encountered Fräulein Elsa's Cabinet of Curiosities when she was traveling with the Maharaja, who considered her valueless and treated her like a pet. Elsa's motives for wanting her were no better, having set her sights on giving Ma Petite to Pepper essentially as a living baby doll. Elsa was able to sway the Maharaja with one of life's purest pleasures: She traded three cases of Dr. Pepper for the sweet young lady.
As Elsa freed Ma Petite from her leash and gifted her to Pepper, both were elated, grateful to have each other. A pure, delicate spirit, Ma Petite is expressive and lively, constantly smiling and handing out hugs and compliments freely, which is exactly why the one thing everyone in the freak show can agree on is how much they love her. But, like her Gemini kin, this charming lass is more than just a pretty face, as her violin and manicure skills prove.
Cancer: Twisty the Clown
If your birthday party fun comes between June 21 and July 22, it's time to brush up on your balloon animal skills, because your "Freak Show" zodiac twin is Twisty the Clown (John Carroll Lynch). Sure, he's generally covered in blood, but the truth is that this water sign just wants to make people smile — even if his efforts are more than a little misplaced. Twisty was once a beloved clown in the Jupiter community until a pair of skeezy circus folk decided to sabotage his success by spreading a vicious rumor.
A gentle spirit to his core, Twisty is an overly sensitive soul with a terrific imagination, which he used to create his clever whirligigs. Clever crabs like Twisty can be a bit shy at times, and they take comfort in their protective clothing, whether that be a favorite jacket or a creepy clown mask. Like Twisty, Cancers tend to be helpful, giving spirits. Unfortunately, they can often have a hard time telling when their giving nature is actually making a situation worse.
Leo: Maggie Esmerelda
If your birthday falls between July 23 and August 22, hang onto your crystal ball: Your "Freak Show" zodiac buddy is the lovely con artist Maggie Esmerelda (Emma Roberts). An orphan raised into a life of crime by Stanley (Denis O'Hare), this fire sign convinces people she's a fortune teller using her skills in cold reading. Like her Leo brethren, this mischievous medium is ruled by her ambitious spirit and gets by on her charm, manipulating others around her while she infiltrates the freak show to make an easy buck.
A tad pretentious and cocky at times, Miss Esmerelda is one of the snappiest dressers in "American Horror Story" history. All she really wants is to live the American dream — right down to the white picket fence. But, despite her ambition, this fierce lioness still has a heart, a trait that reveals itself when she can't bring herself to kill Ma Petite and through her love for Jimmy Darling. If you identify with Maggie Esmerelda's feline nature, invest in a great hat and don't be afraid to fall in love. And whatever you do, try to steer clear of magic shows and big saws as a general life rule.
Virgo: Dandy Mott
Are you a tightly-wound Virgo who enjoys their birthday cake sometime between August 23 and September 22? It's time to bust out the Brylcreem and plaids because your "Freak Show" zodiac character is Dandy Mott. The ultimate mama's boy, Dandy (played by Finn Wittrock) was born with a silver spoon in his mouth and is used to having everything handed to him in life. Like all Virgos, Dandy enjoys his hobbies, which include playing with his many toys and honing his skills as a burgeoning serial killer.
Folks born under this earth sign are known for being impeccable dressers and Dandy is no exception, with his clean-cut appearance, pretty pastels, and occasional ascot. Although he is outwardly classy, as a Virgo, Dandy can be a bit disagreeable, nitpicky, and controlling. He's also extremely tough to please, with his mother going to great lengths to make him happy, even buying out every seat at the freak show and bringing him home a clown to play with. It's just too bad that clown turned out to be a serial killer.
Libra: Pepper
Those born between September 22 and October 23 will identify with one of the purest souls in "American Horror Story" history: Pepper. This microcephalic Libra (played by Naomi Grossman) has led a difficult life by the time we meet her. Sweet and expressive, Pepper has a lightness about her that seems to get her special status with paranormal forces, as seen when she is passed over by Edward Mordrake's ghost and, later in her timeline, chosen by aliens to watch over Grace in "American Horror Story: Asylum."
Known for her loving spirit and easygoing nature, Pepper has a close relationship with Elsa, who calls the Libra her "firstborn" while expressing her unconditional love for her. Pepper also forms a close bond with her "daughter," Ma Petite, and falls profoundly in love with her soulmate, Salty, who has the same condition. Like her Libran kindred, there is more to Pepper than meets the eye: She carries a good deal of pain inside of her, with Elsa at one point remarking on "the depth of that girl's soul." And despite her kind spirit, as those who would cross a transformed Pepper in "Asylum" would learn, she can be tough when she needs to be.
Scorpio: Stanley
If you celebrate your birthday between October 23 and November 21, your "Freak Show" zodiac character is Stanley (Denis O'Hare). As a sneaky Scorpio, this conniving con man lives a life of mystery, intrigue, and duplicity. Like a scorpion, he stings out of nowhere, and when he does, he brings the pain. Betrayal is Stanley's trade and uncomfortable silence is his love language, but Scorpios like Stanley also have their finer points. For one, they have the uncanny ability to pull off a wide range of looks, including (in Stanley's case) a mismatched suit and fedora.
Shrewd, cunning, and disciplined, Stanley is more than capable of playing a long con to get the big payout at the end of the gig. He also has the rare gift of adaptability, able to take off to a new town at the drop of a hat to begin a new life with a new persona. Scorpios like Stanley are not to be crossed since underneath his cool exterior lies a domineering and dangerous spirit.
Sagittarius: Elsa Mars
Do you blow your candles out between November 22 and December 21? As a Sagittarius, your "Freak Show" zodiac twin is none other than glamorous ringmaster Elsa Mars (Jessica Lange). A German expat, Elsa is haunted by her troubled past and her painful desire to be a star in a world that has changed before her eyes. As a Sagittarius, Elsa has a naturally artistic personality that is expressed through her stunning fashion sense and the decadent furnishings of her personal tent.
Keeping her pride in check is a constant uphill battle, and jealousy can rear its ugly head when one of Elsa's performers becomes too much of a star. At times cruel and seemingly cold-hearted, Elsa truly does love her freak show family, especially Ma Petite and Pepper. If you identify with Elsa, just remember not to let your pride get the better of you and to take time out to show your loved ones you care. And when things get a bit too heavy, you can always count on a little David Bowie to pull you through.
Capricorn: Dot Tattler
Those with a birthday that lands somewhere between December 22 and January 19 share Capricorn traits with the conjoined twin and perpetual buzzkill Dot Tattler. Bound to her sister Bette (both are played by Sarah Paulson) for better and worse, Dot has nothing in common with her twin outside of a few shared organs and the ability to hear each other's thoughts. After living a life of captivity under their late mother, the twins are given a place in Elsa's show, where their differences become even more prominent.
As a Capricorn, Dot tends to be the responsible sister, repressing pesky emotions like joy and fun. She also finds it difficult to simply cut loose and go with the flow. Although the sisters are twins, Dot also has a way of looking just a little older and generally takes a long time to warm up to new people. A gifted singer, Dot is at her best when she realizes that her relationship with her sister is a gift — a gift that eventually leads to her finding a happy ending with Bette and Jimmy as they marry and share a child together.
Aquarius: Jimmy Darling
As the water-bearers of the zodiac, folks who celebrate their big day between January 20 and February 18 share their Aquarian spirits with Lobster Boy Jimmy Darling (Evan Peters). The sweetheart of the troupe, Jimmy is an ectrodactylic heartthrob with dreamy Marlon Brando vibes and a motorbike to match. Friendly, free-spirited, and a little rebellious in all the best ways, Jimmy is fiercely loyal to his friends and family and he's not afraid to do what needs to be done to protect them, even if that means rousing them into a murderous frenzy.
Jimmy is definitely a fighter, but he's also a lover. As was shown in the fourth season of "American Horror Story," he's popular with the ladies, though at the end of the day there's only one girl for him. Like his fellow Aquarians, Jimmy has no tolerance for fakeness, a point he makes clear to Dandy Mott when the privileged twerp tries to hitch his wagon to their star.
Pisces: Bette Tattler
As a Pisces whose birthday lands between February 19 and March 20, your "Freak Show" zodiac character is Bette Tattler. Rescued from an uncertain future along with her sister by Elsa, Bette is very much the yang to Dot's yin. While Dot is grounded, stern, and standoffish, Bette is something of a dreamer with a poor sense of boundaries. She is also more emotionally-driven than her sister, a trait that leads her to murder her own mother in a fit of blind rage.
Unlike her Capricorn twin, Pisces Bette is extremely open to new experiences and is more than eager to try new things, from joining the freak show to exploring her womanly desires. While Dot focuses on the reality of their situation, Bette lives in a bit of a dream world, admiring the glamor of starlets to the point that she dyes her hair blonde like Marilyn Monroe. Despite their many differences, the twins love each other dearly — even if Dot does dream of literally cutting her sister loose during a rough patch.