The Big Bang Theory's Most Cringeworthy Moments, Ranked
"The Big Bang Theory" started as a show following four nerdy dudes navigating a world that doesn't always treat them kindly, and that they often fail to understand themselves — while also getting to know the gorgeous new neighbor that moved in across the hall who was inexplicably willing to dive head-first into their friend group almost immediately. As the series went on, it got a lot deeper and more complex than that, but that was always the underlying foundation on which the show's 12 seasons were built.
As many have pointed out, both while the show was on the air and especially in looking back on it since it ended, "The Big Bang Theory" sometimes struggled with making sure the audience was laughing with its characters rather than at them. There were far too many jokes made at the expense of the characters in terms of their gender, race, mental health, self esteem, and various other things that are very tricky to wring humor out of in a way that doesn't feel like punching down at a marginalized group. The show also tended to zero in on the objectively toxic traits of some of the characters and play the way they mistreated others for cheap, uncomfortable laughs.
To be clear, "Big Bang" was a great sitcom overall and did often successfully walk the right side of the line of good-natured jabs and making sure the characters were in on the jokes being made at their own expense. But things definitely got pretty cringeworthy from time to time.
12. Nerds just can't maintain their composure around girls
One of the most overused tropes when a movie or TV show has nerdy male characters is that they lose all sense of composure and forget how to even be a human being in the mere presence of a girl. "The Big Bang Theory" definitely leaned into that pretty hard, including giving Rajesh (Kunal Nayyar) an affliction where he literally couldn't talk to a human female. Unfortunately, it's something that the show continued to mine for laughs many seasons in, even once three of the male members of the group had girlfriends and Raj had been cured of his selective mutism.
In the Season 6 episode "The Bakersfield Expedition," Penny (Kaley Cuoco), Amy (Miyam Bialik), and Bernadette (Melissa Rauch) venture out to the comic book store to help settle a debate they've been having. Upon entering the shop, the camera pans around to all of the guys in the store who have completely frozen in place and are openly gawking at the women, not even attempting to hide the fact that they're doing so. Store owner Stuart (Kevin Sussman) tells his patrons to stop staring, adding, "They're just girls. It's nothing you haven't seen in movies or in drawings." It just really hammers home the stereotype that surely any guy in a comic book store would only have experience with fictional women (and that women wouldn't normally have an interest in comics).
11. Leonard using Penny's body to further his career
It wouldn't be a stretch to say that Leonard's (Johnny Galecki) initial attraction to Penny was entirely physical — given that he was smitten with her before he knew much else about her besides how she looked — and he frequently took it as a point of pride that he was able to land such a hot girlfriend. But their relationship very quickly became deeper than that, and Leonard saw that there was a lot more to Penny than how sexy she is. That particular point played heavily into why Penny was so into Leonard as well, as she finally found a guy who saw her as a person rather than just eye candy.
That makes the episode "The Tenure Turbulence" pretty disappointing. A newly available tenured position at the university comes down to four candidates: Leonard, Sheldon (Jim Parsons), Raj, and Barry Kripke (John Ross Bowie). When competition gets fierce, Leonard is happy to go along with a plan to have Penny wear a revealing dress and flirt with members of the selection committee. He had always encouraged Penny to use her brain more than her body, helping her to realize that she was more than a pretty face and had a lot more to offer. Which makes it all the more gross that he's fine with her using her looks for him and his career — especially since he's competing with two of his closest friends in the process.
10. Penny jokes that Howard's mom weighs more than a car
One of the lowest forms of comedy is the fat joke. Jabs that focus on shaming someone for their size are cheap and offensive, and they should've been left out of comedy writing decades ago. "The Big Bang Theory" had trouble resisting that urge, and would frequently have the characters making fun of Howard's (Simon Helberg) mother's weight. The fact that she was never fully shown on screen — she was typically just shouting from another room, voiced by the late Carol Ann Susi — only seemed to egg the writers on, crafting jokes about whatever size she needed to be for a given punchline.
It can be argued that it was even worse when Howard's friends took digs at Mrs. Wolowitz's weight, especially since — by all accounts — she was always kind and sweet to them. One of the worst examples of this can be found in the episode "The Engagement Reaction," when the gang is at the hospital after Howard's mom suffers a medical emergency. Even with the assumption that she might have had a heart attack and therefore could be in bad shape, Penny begins taking shots at Mrs. Wolowitz's size, implying that she weighs more than a car.
It's extremely mean-spirited in any situation, but even more so when nobody knows how serious of a medical issue Mrs. Wolowitz might be having or if a doctor is going to emerge at any moment with bad news.
9. Amy takes her infatuation with Penny too far
It wasn't long after Amy had entered the social circle of the main crew that she began to assert herself as Penny's BFF. While she was initially excited to be friends with someone she deemed cool and popular, it soon became apparent that Amy also had a bit of a crush on Penny. For the most part, it seemed like the kind of innocent, platonic crush that friends often get on each other. But there were times when Amy's behavior towards Penny was downright inappropriate.
Amy having basic boundary issues could be explained away by the fact that she seems to have neurodivergent tendencies, though the show never definitively labels her or any of the other characters as such. Still, it would justify the way she doesn't always recognize that she's crossing a line with Penny. The majority of the time, the things she says to Penny about Penny's looks or body don't seem to have inappropriate intent.
But there are several examples of Amy going too far and there being no good excuse for her to do so, making Penny justifiably uncomfortable. A big one is when she not only barges in on Penny with a camera while Penny's trying on a dress, but she lingers for a few seconds too long and then turns the camera back a second time for one last look — despite Penny's embarrassed protests and desperate attempt to cover up.
8. Inviting Stuart to a practice brunch but not the real thing
Out of any regular or recurring character on "The Big Bang Theory," it's tough to argue that any were treated worse than Stuart. Again, while the show never made a habit of putting labels on its characters, Stuart definitely has his struggles and they wreak havoc on his self-esteem. But of all the things that he desires and just can't seem to have, the saddest one might be acceptance into the friend group of the rest of the characters.
It's bad enough how long it takes for Stuart to be fully welcomed into the circle. Even worse is that, before he is, he's often blatantly mistreated by everyone else, always willing to take it simply because it means getting to at least be friend-adjacent for a little while. The few times he manages to speak up for himself in that regard, you know it's because something especially cruel is being inflicted upon him.
Take the episode "The Fetal Kick Catalyst," in which Stuart and a few others are invited to what they think is a brunch being hosted by Sheldon and Amy. They soon discover that it's nothing more than a practice for the real brunch they hope to host later — a brunch that Stuart wasn't invited to. When he finds out, he delivers to Amy the heartbreaking line, "I consider you and Sheldon like my family, and I'm not even sure you think of me as a friend."
7. Leonard and Penny literally treat Sheldon like a child
There are endless debates about how much of Sheldon's frequent meanness to his friends is forgivable given his inability to fully understand the effect of his words and actions on others. People also have varying ideas about the level of pushback Sheldon receives from his friends, whether they should grin and bear it more often than they do, or if "correcting" him helps him become a better friend and partner.
That said, there is no denying that Sheldon's friends are often unnecessarily mean to him about some of the things he's into that don't hurt anybody, but are mocked as immature or childish for no good reason. In fact, there are far too many times when Sheldon's friends literally treat him like a child, which is an awful way to treat any adult no matter what kinds of issues they have.
Take, for instance, the episode "The Spaghetti Catalyst," in which Leonard and Penny have broken up and Sheldon is having trouble remaining friends with both of them. Rather than have a hard conversation with Sheldon about his struggles with this major source of upheaval for his life and work through it like adults, the two treat him like the child of a divorced couple, bickering about him right in front of his face and taking turns having "custody" of him like he's a toddler.
6. Howard's horribly offensive Raj impersonation
Comedian Hari Kondabolu's 2017 documentary "The Problem with Apu" takes a hard look at the stereotypical portrayal of Apu from "The Simpsons" and the way that Indian Americans have had to deal with comparisons to the character for literally decades. Much of the controversy stemmed from the fact that, since his first appearance in 1990, Apu had been voiced by white actor Hank Azaria, who gave Apu a comically exaggerated accent that has become a blanket impression frequently used to mock people of South Asian and Middle Eastern descent.
Though the "Big Bang Theory" episode "The Grasshopper Experiment" pre-dates "The Problem with Apu" by about ten years, even back in 2007 it was pretty widely accepted that white actors doing over-the-top approximations of the accents of people of color was offensive and should've been left back in the 20th century. And yet, we see Howard pretending to be Raj on the phone and doing a very Apu-like accent for an excruciating 30 seconds of so-called comedy, made all the worse by how hard it makes Leonard laugh and the fact that it elicits applause from the live studio audience at the end. Raj even complains that Howard made him "sound like a 'Simpsons' character," acknowledging the likely source of the impersonation. Sadly, it wouldn't be the only time Howard either did a similar impression of Raj or otherwise mocked some facet of his Indian heritage.
5. Penny gets stalked, and then blamed for leading her stalker on
We're all in agreement that a man shouldn't look up a woman's information on the internet and then show up at her front door unannounced, especially if they aren't already in an intimate relationship together, right? Well, when that happens to Penny in the episode "The Misinterpretation Agitation," the vibe from the group is basically that she led him on and that this is just the type of thing you have to expect when you flirt with people.
Beyond the disgusting aspect of essentially victim-blaming Penny for being stalked, there's also the uncomfortable fact that she was stalked in the first place by one of the clients of her pharmaceutical sales job. Played by guest star Billy Bob Thornton, the man accuses Penny of sending him mixed signals, while she insists she was just being nice as part of her job and that he can't just chase down every woman who shows him kindness. It's the right message, but too much of the subtext leading up to it feels like Penny is at fault for sending mixed signals. It's never a good thing when it's implied that a man who behaves inappropriately toward a woman "couldn't help it" because of the behavior of said woman.
4. Raj scoffs at the notion of having to talk to unattractive people
Of the main cast of "The Big Bang Theory," nobody is more unlucky in love than Raj. By the end, the other six main characters have all paired off and were married, while Raj remains the sole single person among the regulars when the credits roll on the series finale. How much sympathy fans felt for Raj and his dating struggles varied over the years, from feeling bad that this sweet guy with a big heart just couldn't find the right person to believing he self-sabotages his chance at love with his own toxic behavior and therefore deserves to be alone.
A clear example of the latter comes during a car conversation in the Season 7 episode "The Hesitation Ramification." In an effort help improve his communication skills, Howard suggests Raj might get more comfortable at speaking to women he is attracted to if he simply talks to more people, period. Reading between the lines in the worst way possible, Raj gets a disgusted look on his face and asks, "You mean fatties and uggos?" The fact that Raj has a such a negative and visceral reaction to the mere idea of having to lower himself by talking to anyone but thin, beautiful women is definitely one of those moments that lost Raj some supporters among "Big Bang" viewers.
3. Howard and Raj are mocked for being close
A frequent target of criticism in sitcoms from the 2000s and earlier is the prevalence of gay panic jokes, in which a character takes it as an insult to be suspected of being gay, and can't defend himself against the accusation quickly enough. There was a lot of that on "The Big Bang Theory," particularly with Raj, and it's a shame that a TV show that aired so recently was still mocking male characters for being sensitive or feminine.
"Big Bang" also frequently takes jabs at Howard and Raj's friendship, depicting the two men as being especially close to and comfortable with each other, but typically turning it around and making fun of them for it. They also aren't willing to wave off mockery of how close they are and instead get deeply offended by it — again, resorting to the whole gay panic thing. There is a moment in the episode "The Deception Verification" when Howard is feeling insecure about his body, so he shows Raj his chest for reassurance. Raj does the same, and soon, the two men are touching each other for comparison purposes.
Rather than a tender moment between two friends, no different than one two women might share for similar reasons, the whole scene is played for laughs — right up to Bernadette catching them and being appalled by the whole thing.
2. Amy manipulates Sheldon for intimate physical contact
It's well established that Sheldon struggles with any sort of physical contact, even just a friendly hug. Though Amy is justified in moments of frustration over the lack of physical intimacy in their early period of dating, it's something she knew would come with the territory, and she has to be willing to wait until he's comfortable enough to touch her.
When Amy gets the flu and Sheldon comes over to take care of her, she finds herself the recipient of some rare hands-on time when he volunteeres to rub Vick's on her chest. It's hard to blame her for enjoying the moment on a more intimate level than Sheldon intended, but it's something he's volunteered to do, so it's fine that she goes with it. However, when she begins feeling better and realizes that those VapoRub rubdowns are going to stop, she pretends she's still sick in order to get Sheldon to keep touching her. The moment she begins faking her illness, she's being deceitful and was manipulating Sheldon into touching her in a way that he wouldn't have done under normal circumstances.
As for the spanking he offers to deliver to her once he discovers her ruse, it's hard to completely believe he's oblivious to how she's going to take that — so that one is kind of on him.
1. Howard and Raj use a drone to spy on models and then lie their way into the model's mansion
Much has been said about how gross and pervy of a character Howard was before he met Bernadette, and it's debatable how much of his behavior was okay to laugh at and how much of it was simply uncomfortable to watch. One of his worst moments — and because he was involved, one of Raj's worst as well — occurred in the Season 2 episode "The Panty Piñata Polarization." Howard and Raj are obsessed with the TV show "America's Next Top Model," but aren't content passively watching it on television. So they concoct an elaborate plan to not only find out where the models on the show are staying, but to spy on them.
As gross as it was when Howard hid a webcam in a teddy bear he gifted to Penny, this is on a whole other level as it involves spying on many women. In addition, while Howard knew that a few shots of Penny changing clothes was all he could ever shoot for with her, he and Raj not only spy on the models at their mansion using advanced military techniques, but the two then lie their way into the mansion, which puts them in physical proximity of the women and allows them to do all sorts of inappropriate and cringeworthy things. It's very likely that Howard's big mouth gets the two of them kicked out minutes after they arrive, but that doesn't change the fact that he and Raj had designs on doing a lot of disgusting things in that mansion — and they lied and deceived their way in there to begin with.