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Princess Leia's Best Star Wars One-Liners Ranked By Sass

Everyone loves Han Solo and Luke Skywalker, but if it weren't for Leia Organa, none of the rebels in "A New Hope" would have made it past the first film. Since the first moment Carrie Fisher put her hair in cinnamon buns and stepped into the role of Princess Leia, she immediately became a feminist icon. Gone were helpless princesses that required rescuing, replaced from her very first moment in the franchise by a whip-smart, kindhearted politician willing to get her hands dirty — even if her preferred methods were to lead with empathy and hope.

Though she has an endearing soft side, Leia's words can burn hotter than the lava on Mustafar. With a penchant for sarcastic one-liners, the princess-turned-general provided the franchise with some of its most quoted lines. Instead of the infamous "Holiday Special," George Lucas would have perhaps been better served releasing a Dean Martin-like "Star Wars" character roast, with Leia overseeing the dais. Whether the characters are future lovers, current enemies, friends or family who are irritating her, Leia has levels when it comes to how hard she goes in her retorts.

From the original series through the sequels and "Obi-Wan-Kenobi," here are Princess Leia's best one-liners, scientifically, methodically ranked in order of sass.

Will someone get this big walking carpet out of my way?

It's okay, Chewie. Leia doesn't mean it. It's no secret that a good 90% of Leia's exasperated sass is a product of one Han Solo. The part-time pilot, part-time nerf-herder is an expert at getting a rise out of the princess, and he knows it. Given that their often acidic will-they-won't-they dalliances takes place during a galactic war, there is occasionally collateral damage.

After the rebels escape a near-death situation in the trash compacter during "A New Hope," Leia has had enough of dealing with Han's obstinance. She tells him in no uncertain terms to follow her lead. Of course, Han is too busy trying to look cool for that to fly, opting to call her "your worshipfulness" and refusing to follow anyone's orders but his own. In a frustrated rage, she breezes past Chewbacca, saying, "Will someone get this big walking carpet out of my way?"

As far as Leia one-liners go, it's pretty tame, but it still probably hurt Chewie's feelings. Though Leia has a biting wit, she's not as savage as she sounds, either. She no doubt apologized to the Kashyyyk native at some point, perhaps looking the other way as he cheated during a game of Dejarik.

Poe, get your head out of your cockpit!

As it turns out, watching your only child turn into a clone of your fascist father dampens your fire. When Star Wars fans caught up with Leia Organa again in the sequels, she was a lot more sullen and reserved — even if her hope still beats strong. Leia's tenacity (and empathy) are what make her an unparalleled leader, and she's not afraid to stand her ground and make others fall in line. 

No matter how much time has passed, Leia was a born commander and politician — just like her biological mother. She may love Poe Dameron like a son, and perhaps sees a little Han in him, but that doesn't stop her from reading him the riot act. In fact, Poe's Han-like tendencies may be the reason she's so hard on him. After saving the galaxy only to watch it fall once more, Leia knows the stakes (and mistakes) that cost lives and doom planets. 

After Poe disobeys orders to take down a dreadnaught, Leia says, "Poe, get your head out of your cockpit" — but not before she slaps and demotes him. When Poe says that there were heroes on the mission, Leia retorts, "Dead heroes. No leaders." Given that Leia watched her entire planet blow up in "A New Hope," only to continue the fight, she knows the difference between futile recklessness and sacrificing oneself for the greater good. If it takes some sassiness to teach Poe that lesson, all the better. 

If money is all that you love, then that's what you'll receive.

There's little denying that Leia is the most compassionate person in the Star Wars films; after watching the destruction of Alderaan, she comforts Luke over his loss of Obi-Wan Kenobi — a man he knew for only a few days. Meanwhile, Leia lost both of her parents and her entire planet in one fell swoop. To boot, as viewers learned in "Obi-Wan Kenobi," Leia had a close bond with Ben long before Luke even realized who he was. After all that loss, she's still busy comforting Luke over a surface-level connection to a mentor he barely knew. Honestly, the galaxy would be a lot better off if all the Skywalkers were compassionate, brave, and levelheaded like Leia. 

Selfishness is not a character trait of which the princess thinks highly. When Han is desperate to get his money and run in "A New Hope," she turns ice cold, sneering: "If money is all that you love, then that's what you'll receive." It's true that no one can come across as heartless quite like Han Solo — but bravado or not, he wouldn't leave his friends, or the cause, in the lurch. He just needed a fearless princess to knock some sense into him.

Into the garbage chute, fly boy.

It's easy to forget that "Star Wars: A New Hope" debuted in 1977. The special effects (and, of course, endless Lucasfilm tinkering) ensure that it never feels too outdated — but it's not just the visuals that were ahead of its time. When it comes to marketing and merch, the Star Wars franchise tends to leave women in the dust, even if some feel Leia is the true hero of the franchise. If it weren't for her, after all, Han and Luke wouldn't have made it through the first film, let alone survive long enough to appear in sequels. Mark Hamill can attest to that

Whether she's roasting Han and Luke for their poor rescue attempt or dressing up like a Boushh to save Han in "Return of the Jedi," the princess is quite capable of handling things on her own. Clearly the brains of the operation, Leia takes action when Han and Luke face a firing squad of Stormtroopers in the first film. After blasting a hole through the garbage chute, she quips: "Someone has to save our skins. Into the garbage chute, fly boy." Is this her most clever quip? No, but it was one of the first introductions to Leia being a woman of action — a refreshing storyline, particularly for 1977.

Why, you stuck up, half-witted, scruffy-looking, nerf-herder!

Sure, Leia's nerf-herder dig is certainly one of her most memorable (and quoted) exchanges with Han, but it's not her snappiest or best-executed barb. A good chunk of "The Empire Strikes Back" hinges on the sexual tension between Han and Leia boiling over. Neither stubborn rebel wants to admit that they have genuine feelings for each other, leading to more than a few heated exchanges, despite the icy temperatures of Hoth.

When Han tells Luke that Leia professed her feelings to him (she didn't), a flabbergasted Leia is so irritated that she spits out, "Why, you stuck up ... half-witted ... scruffy-looking ... nerf-herder!" Of course, the pair doesn't have a more candid conversation about their budding feelings until Han faces his carbonite fate on Bespin. 

Granddaughter, maybe.

While Leia gets her sass on in the original trilogy, she's apparently even more savage as a child. 

Fans met a 10-year-old Leia in "Obi-Wan Kenobi," and the show's no-filter-Leia was even snarkier than her grown-up counterpart. She was just as incisively witty as a child, apparently, not just a petulant kid. She's deeply intelligent and expressive, as are her comebacks.

When Obi-Wan tells Leia to pretend that she's his daughter to keep their identities a secret, the young rebel mutters, "Granddaughter, maybe." 

It's a reference, perhaps, to all the snarky internet comments about the relatively brief period of time that will elapse between the "Kenobi" series and when Ben appears again as Alec Guinness in "A New Hope." In some ways, the line is meant to imply that Ewan McGregor isn't as young as he appears. In others, it sets up what seems like a tough couple of years that will soon take Kenobi from the visages of McGregor to Guinness.

It's not the only time Leia remarks on Obi-Wan's advancing years. She also tells him that he seems "kinda old and beat up." Just wait until he ages 30 years in a single decade, Leia. 

Well, I guess you don't know everything about women yet.

Han clearly didn't learn his lesson after Leia called him a scruffy-looking nerf-herder, bragging to Luke, "I must have hit pretty close to the mark to get her all riled up like that, huh, kid?" 

At the time, these moments (and the ensuing kiss) were the foundation of a love triangle that had audiences debating whether Leia should choose naive, sweet-faced Luke or bad-boy rogue Solo. Of course, all these decades later, Star Wars fans have the information that Luke and Leia are brother and sister — so any Team Edward/Team Jacob-like debate tipped in favor of Solo long ago.  

Leia burned Han in retaliation with the line: "Well, I guess you don't know everything about women yet." The kiss then used Luke's crush on her to make Han jealous. At the time, it seemed cute and innocent; looking back now, the kiss might be the grossest thing in the galaxy far, far away this side of a Rancor cage in need of cleaning.

I don't know where you get your delusions, laser brain.

A Leia and Han sitcom, where the pair navigated verbal sparring matches and encroaching sexual tension "Moonlighting"-style, feels like the greatest '80s-era idea George Lucas never explored. After all, Leia's best lines inevitably seemed to come from the screen time she shared with Harrison Ford.

For instance, when Han accused her "worship" of playing a part in getting Han to stay on Hoth, Leia denied it. Of course, this won't stand for Han, firing back: "I think you just can't bear to let a gorgeous guy like me out of your sight." To which Leia snapped back: "I don't know where you get your delusions, laser brain." 

Their is dismissive savagery in her delivery that sells the exchange. Leia is nothing if not cool under pressure, and that extends to verbal battles as much as physical ones. She'll be the first to let her exasperation show, but it typically doesn't stop her from getting in the last word (or expertly delivering a mildly childish diss). 

Aren't you a little short for a stormtrooper?

Luke thought in "A New Hope" that he was a space knight in shining armor, coming to rescue a beautiful princess in distress. That dream was shattered quickly, however, when Leia greeted him with: "Aren't you a little short for a stormtrooper?" 

If fans weren't already struck by the nonconformist attitude of this particular princess, her nonchalant lounging while being held captive by a ruthless dictator may have done the trick. A breath of fresh air, Leia was no sleeping beauty.

Of course, Luke hadn't planned out much of a mission strategy, so when the rescue of Leia quickly went south, the princess took the wheel. The stormtrooper costume improvisation gave way to her wits and guile, as the rebels navigated their way through the perilous catacombs of the Death Star. In many ways, she rescued them.

I'd just as soon kiss a Wookiee.

If the events of "The Empire Strikes Back" were anything to go by, it looked for a while like Leia just might have to kiss a Wookiee — because Hoth froze over. Han coaxed Leia to admit that she wanted him to stay because of her feelings, saying: "Afraid I was gonna leave you without giving you a goodbye kiss?" 

Without missing a beat, Leia shot back: "I'd just as soon kiss a Wookiee." While Leia never had any intentions of taking Han up on the offer, he snapped, "I can arrange that." 

Han was undoubtedly longing for Leia to come clean about her interest and give him a reason to stay. Whether he wanted to admit it or not, if Leia asked him to stay for her in that moment, he likely wouldn't have done it. 

Then I guess I don't need manners when I'm talking to you.

When it comes to Leia Organa's sassometer, there are typically three categories her one-liners fall under: flirting foreplay, political roasting, or a smackdown of questionable ethics. A

Viewers saw all three on display with "Obi-Wan Kenobi." Even when Leia was young, it seems, she had little patience for class status or treating droids like inconsequential servants. When Leia doesn't like someone, it's pretty easy to tell. The Disney+ show offered fans their first substantial glimpse at Alderaan, and as a result, introduced a good number of Leia's adopted family.

When Leia's cousin mocked her for thanking a droid, explaining "You don't need manners when you are talking to a lower-life form," she shot back: "Then I guess I don't need manners when I'm talking to you." 

After that scorching burn, Leia whipped out the daddy issues card, accusing him of blindly parroting his father's every idea out of fear. "You've never made one decision for yourself in your entire life," she reasoned. "And you never will." The sass is strong with this one.

Governor Tarkin, I should have expected to find you holding Vader's leash.

Grand Moff Tarkin wishes his insults were as grand as those of Leia Organa. However, what Tarkin lacks in wit, he compensates for in genocide — with Alderaan paying the price. When Leia spots Tarkin as she's dragged to the Death Star demonstration, she says, "Governor Tarkin, I should have expected to find you holding Vader's leash." 

There's a keen difference between Leia trash talking people she loves and insulting her enemies. Her attempts to goad Tarkin are ruthless, adding, "I recognized your foul stench when I was brought on board." It's clear these two have a history in the political sphere, as Tarkin dismissively feigns regret at personally signing the executive order to execute her. She calls his bluff, sharing her shock that he had the spaceballs to sign the order himself, noting, "The more you tighten your grip, Tarkin, the more star systems will slip through your fingers."

Before the heartbreaking destruction of Alderaan, the scene in "A New Hope" marks one of the first moments viewers get to see Leia in political action — and it's abundantly clear that she can hold her own. While she might think twice about goading her political enemies so excessively in the future, the moment lays the groundwork for her most competent reinvention: General Organa. 

Captain, being held by you isn't quite enough to get me excited.

There's nothing quite like escaping an asteroid field and landing in the mouth of a space slug to get two people in the mood — the mood to ratio each other, that is. 

If any woman in the galaxy has the skills to make even the most suave guy question his game, it's Leia Organa. In "The Empire Strikes Back," the Falcon thrashes around, knocking Leia into Han's arms. She demands release, but Han is too busy trying to decipher a noise he hears. After asking Han to release her for the second time, he says, "Don't get excited." She may be lying out of her teeth, but Leia responds with, "Captain, being held by you isn't quite enough to get me excited."

Sure, Leia has thrown more than her share of shade Han's way, but this is the harshest quip she's thrown at him on the fly. That being said, his response of "Sorry, sweetheart. We haven't got time for anything else" is equally impressive. However, it's the Cheshire Cat smirk he wields that takes the titillating invitation to the next level. If these crazy kids can set aside their insults for five seconds, this moment reminded the audience, they might actually make a good pair.