The Terrible Power Couple On That '70s Show That Never Happened
The gang from the long-running Fox sitcom That '70s Show always seemed like the kind of kids we'd like to have hung out with in high school. Geeky Eric Forman (Topher Grace) was always ready with a well-timed quip alongside his girlfriend Donna Pinciotti (Laura Prepon) with an even better-timed burn; goofy lunkhead Michael Kelso (Ashton Kutcher) could always be counted on to provide a hilarious physical pratfall, and his sometime main squeeze Jackie Burkhart (Mila Kunis) could amuse by somehow being just as wise as she was clueless. Cynical stoner Steven Hyde (Danny Masterson) could regale us with weird conspiracy theories for hours, and the foreign exchange student known only as Fez (Wilmer Valderrama) could be hilarious with only his lurking, leering presence (and, well, awesome disco moves). Often overlooked, though, is Eric's big sister Laurie (Lisa Robin Kelly), whose two-faced nature and wicked wit was always good for stirring things up — as was her penchant for, ahem, dating anything that moved.
Laurie's offscreen pursuits were often implied to be far too numerous to even mention, and as far as the gang goes, she fooled around with Kelso behind Jackie's back for an entire season and married Fez so he could stay in the country. Aside from her brief stint as Kelso's kinda-girlfriend, though, she never seemed to end up in anything resembling a lasting relationship. Some fans found this to be a little odd, because That '70s Show's writers actually provided her with the perfect boyfriend, yet somehow failed to follow through. Beginning in the show's fourth season, we were introduced to the character of Casey Kelso (Luke Wilson), Michael's older brother, who dated Donna for a short time after she and Eric broke up. Casey was too cool for school, totally self-centered, and not the sharpest knife in the drawer — a Kelso, in short. As such, he was never right for Donna — but he would have been absolutely perfect for Laurie.
Casey and Laurie would have made the perfect couple
It's not just that the two characters are so similar (and so similarly shallow), but that the comedic possibilities in their pairing would have been nothing short of inspired. Laurie, accustomed to wrapping men around her little finger with her feminine wiles, would have found Casey to be just a bit of a challenge; even when he managed to land Donna, who was obviously too good for him, he would blow her off for such scintillating activities as cleaning the carburetor in his Trans Am. If anybody could ever have put a crack in his cool exterior, though, it would have been Laurie, and not only because she was shamelessly flirtatious and similarly aloof, but because she was smarter than both Kelsos put together.
Speaking of which, how hilarious would it have been watching Michael tie himself in knots watching his ex-side chick dating his brother? That certainly doesn't seem like the kind of thing his ego would allow him to abide, and when Michael's ego was bruised, it tended to make him do awesomely stupid things. Heck, Casey and Laurie hooking up might even have prompted Michael to actually stand up to Casey (beyond spitting in his socks and skipping a few showers so he could stink up Casey's bed when big brother was out of town). A knock-down, drag-out battle of the lunkheads for the hand of the most, er, well-traveled girl in Point Place? One doesn't miss opportunities much harder than that.
We suppose there might have been a reason why Casey didn't stick around for more episodes; after all, Wilson is a movie star who was busy during That '70s Show's run starring in flicks like Legally Blonde, The Royal Tenenbaums, and the most underrated comedy of all time, Idiocracy. But it would have been cool to see how the relationship of Casey and Laurie, who undoubtedly would have made the most hysterically terrible power couple of all time, would have played out.