Grogu Breaks Down The Mandalorian S3E2: Mandalore Isn't Childproofed
Contains spoilers for "The Mandalorian" Season 3, Episode 2 — "Chapter 18"
Well, after having himself a space whale of a time last week – what with all the fun office furniture and reactivated killer robots that made their appearance — Grogu is back, once again, to bless us with his side of the story.
Last week, Grogu gave us his takeaways from the season premiere of "The Mandalorian," and he expressed his concerns to us over visiting Mandalore so that Din Djarin (Pedro Pascal) could be absolved of his recent clothing mishaps. Let's be honest, poisonous planets aren't on anyone's bucket list, especially when it's all just to ensure you get to wear your helmet with a bit more respect. The good news? The planet wasn't poisonous. It was, however, riddled with angry-looking locals and giant robot spiders that were out to get his dear old Dad, leading Grogu to go it alone and call for backup.
But could this recent aid establish a more extended alliance in the future? Might Din's faith in the old ways be tested with Bo Katan (Katee Sackhoff) on the scene to have him questioning if "this is the way," after all? Let's hand it over to the little green gymnastic gumdrop to share his thoughts on the matter. You're on, Grogu!
Grogu's Lesson #1: I don't flip enough
Two years. For two snarking years (pardon my language), I was with that dead-eyed master Luke whats-his-name, and never once did I pick up a lightsaber, learn how to get past seeing anyone's identification, or pick up spaceships with my mind. You know, the basic stuff. No, instead, all I cracked was being able to flip. Frontflips. Backflips. Some flips over your head. Seriously, I don't want to burst Din's bubble or anything, but the biggest reason I ditched the other guy is that his training regime took far too long. I was all, "I'm not afraid," and he was all, "You will be." Pretty sure he stole that from someone else, anyway.
Ah well, no point stressing over poor schooling. We caught up with that mechanic with a wild mane, Peli Motto (Amy Sedaris), who at least appreciates my flips. Dad hoped she'd have a spare memory chip for IG-11, which I still think doesn't make much sense. He'd be a whole new droid by that point. He's having none of it and is adamant about getting him fixed, which Peli can't do. She can sell off a droid to Dad to check out the atmosphere on Mandalore for us, however. I don't think it's worth his nuts and bolts, but better than us, I guess.
Grogu's Lesson #2: Maps and money are important
So we've made it to Mandalore, and honestly, from space, it screams, "Turn back, all ye who enter" ... so of course, Big Daddy Din wants to go there. I'm surprised Empire social services haven't been on his case yet with the "adventures" he takes me on. Before we drop, though, he shows me around the place. He talks about his home planet and Bo Katan's spot, where she's probably still moping on her throne, alone.
"A Mandalorian has to understand maps to know his way around; that way, he'll never be lost." That's all good, but can you understand your money as well?
Because of this dump, we're down on Mandalore for no more than five minutes and lose our brand spanking new R5 droid. That's a hefty amount of credits down the drain already. How ever can we retrieve him? If only we had someone who could pressurize their helmet so they could venture outside. Oh, you do, Dad? Then why didn't you do that in the first place? For a guy with such an alarming connection to his helmet, you'd think he'd be using it every chance he gets, and that includes protecting any work-related expenses that are liable to get ripped apart by the locals.
Grogu's Lesson #3: Mandalore needs some work
We've been to some sketchy spots over the years, but for a place that Dad doesn't shut up about, Mandalore is straight-up nightmare fuel. Even its basements have basements, and I didn't want to venture into a single one of them. Even so, with me in my hover-crib and him head to toe in protective gear to avoid any potential danger (seriously, when do I get a helmet?), we headed down to find the Living Waters and instead got jumped by a giant robot crab. Perfect.
Dad is out of commission, and here I am, stuck in the seventh circle of space hell, trying to get him out. I try to use the Force that everyone keeps going on about, but no space dice. Instead, all I can resort to is a good old-fashioned flipping to get out of the place and see if Bo Katan and get off her high stone horse and come help a Mandalorian out. I don't expect any issues. No one in the galaxy can resist if I gurgle a few times and make my ears droop. Who needs Jedi mind tricks when you look like this? I mean, really.
Grogu's Lesson #4: Bo Katan is kinda cool
Mission easily accomplished. After seeing that, I fly over to her place alone (is no one impressed by this, by the way?). We take Bo's ride, which is way cooler than Dad's (don't tell him I said that), and she takes us on a trip down memory lane, telling us all about how her family ruled Mandalore for a time before things went sideways. She's also run into other Jedis like me (I'm not really a Jedi yet, but don't tell her that), and both orders used to be on speaking terms. That explains why the old man and I are so tight, probably. Yeah, this Bo Katan lady is okay, thinking about it. She's also an absolute badass. Honestly, maybe I'll start defending Bo-Katan from all her haters.
After taking down a group of Alamites, she catches up with Dad and his robot-eyed captor, and this dude won't die. Giant robot spider or no, though, Bo Katan isn't messing around and schools this hardwired hoarder without breaking a sweat. Now all that's left to do is head back to Bo's place, get on the ship, and ... oh brilliant, Dad still wants to go swimming. This guy sometimes, honestly. Can't he pick up a rock from somewhere around here and return it to the Armorer? How's she going to know?
Grogu's Lesson #5: Mythosaurs sound gnarly
Din is still set on heading to the Living Waters, even though I'm not. Already low on fluids thanks to that robot guy, he's looking a little rough (guessing so, what with the visor and all). Bo entertains him by leading him to the pool of Living Water, where there hasn't been a light fitting in centuries. Yet again, though, for someone so keen to turn her back on the old ways, she's happy to share the history of Mandalore and its origins. Turns out the first Mandalore that headed down to these waters faced off with a Mythosaur (they were a bit lazy on the naming back then, I'm guessing). The OG Mando bested the creature, and that's why the sigil of the Mandalorians is what it is (ours is better, of course).
Naturally, in this dimly lit lair where a giant monster used to roam, Dad is happy to go for a dip before getting yanked down in seconds. Once again, Bo has to jump in to rescue Pops and is gone for some time, which has got me thinking — should my crib come with scuba gear? Sure, hovering is great, but what if I took up submarining as a hobby? Why is my Dad tooled up to the nines and all I've got is this floating bed? He hasn't changed the sheets for weeks — it stinks in here. Anyway, Bo saves him, and I miss it all. Maybe I should've stuck with Luke?