Strange Things About Lois Lane And Superman's Relationship
Superman and Lois Lane are arguably DC Comics' most iconic duo. In fact, they might be the most famous couple in superhero history. (Deal with it, Peter Parker and Mary Jane.) The pair flew onto comic book shelves in 1938 between the sacred pages of Action Comics, and neither their presence nor impact on fans have dwindled since.
Of course, it's easy for fans to focus on the romantic moments between the Daily Planet power couple, but with the good comes the strange. And by strange, we mean really strange. Granted, over 80 years of shenanigans between the couple is a long time to keep the romance fresh, and Lois and Clark have each invented their fair share of interesting tactics to keep each other on their toes. Nevertheless, these two are so weird that they would even make Bizarro balk. Between some pretty significant consent issues, straight-up murder, and fairy tale role-play gone wrong, here are some incredibly strange things about Lois Lane and Superman's relationship.
That time Superman became a polygamist
When you're as coveted as Superman, sometimes one copy of yourself isn't enough to go around. In reality, that would be an issue. But within the panels of comic book adventures, anything is possible — even splitting yourself in two. And in Superman #162, Supes does the unthinkable. He separates into a red and blue version of himself.
In an act that satiates both Clana (Clark Kent/Lana Lang) and Clois (Clark/Lois) shippers alike, each woman marries their own Man of Steel. Lois settles down with the red version of Superman on a newly restored Krypton. Lana weds blue Supes, and they ultimately chill out on a paradise version of Earth. It's not exactly the most conventional arrangement, but since when has Superman settled for anything less than five shades past extra? At least the two (almost) identical copies aren't likely to run into each other on different planets. Polygamy may not be everyone's cup of tea, but if it works, it works.
Lois Lane finds Clark naked in a burning field
Smallville takes the unconventional route when Lois Lane (Erica Durance) appears in the show's fourth season. Meeting a future spouse naked in a burning field where they can't even remember their name isn't exactly the meet-cute dreams are made of. Unless you're into that kind of thing? As it turns out, Clark Kent (Tom Welling) and Lois Lane are definitely into that kind of thing.
It all goes down in the first episode of season four, "Crusade," when Lois shows up to investigate the death of her cousin. But during her little road trip, she winds up in a cornfield where she discovers Clark in the nude, lying in a burned patch of corn (courtesy of a lightning strike). When Supes gets up on his feet, he insists that he's fine when a scandalized Lois insists that she take him to the hospital. She fires back, "You've just been hit by lightning, you're stark naked, and, uh, you don't even remember your name." When Lois came to town to investigate her cousin's apparent death, she definitely wasn't expecting to find a nude alien with amnesia.
The scene offers some of the most unsubtle foreplay a teen drama has ever seen. While her future lover lacks pants, Lois repeatedly tells herself to look at his face and not ... um ... lower. Their will they/won't they flirtations last for five seasons while Clark navigates neverending love triangle with Lana and his debatable heart-eyes for Lex. Even after they start dating, there's something awkward (and charming) about their witty banter and resolved sexual tension. But it never gets quite as weird as that day they ran into each other in a cornfield, one dressed, one wearing only his birthday super suit.
Superman ditched Lois and their unborn child
Ditching your girlfriend and unborn child for five years isn't very super, Superman. However, Brandon Routh's Superman Returns shows the Man of Tomorrow leaving Earth behind for a lot longer than a day. In the film, Supes flees to the newly discovered remains of his home planet, Krypton, leaving behind the only woman he ever loved. To be fair, Clark doesn't know that Lois (Kate Bosworth) is pregnant when he flees, but the guy has X-ray vision. Is there really any excuse?
To make matters worse, Lois is engaged to Perry White's nephew (who believes he's Jason's father). But human kids don't have an aversion to Kryptonite. And when Superman returns from his absence, he expects everything to go back to the way it was. As usual, he gets his way. After a fight with Lex Luthor and a rescue mission, it's not long before Lois is in Superman's steely arms once again.
Lois and Clark's children multiply
Having a kid while simultaneously saving the world is no easy feat. Finding out that your children multiplied while you were out saving the world is even harder (and weirder). However, that's something Clark Kent has to deal with in the Arrowverse.
Supergirl's version of Lois Lane makes her first appearance in the Arrowverse crossover episode "Elseworlds," where Lois and Clark reveal that they're expecting a baby. Cut to a year later, and fans meet the fresh parents in "Crisis on Infinite Earths," where they have one child, Jonathan. However, the series' most notorious villain to date, the Anti-Monitor, is busy destroying multiple Earths in the multiverse. When everything's said and done, the gang can only save one Earth — and reality as they know it is altered forever.
After it's all said and done, superhero J'onn J'onzz restores the pre-Crisis memories of his allies, who become the only people who remember their previous reality. But things are kinda different in this strange new version of Earth, especially for those with memories of how things used to be. Take Superman, for example. Clark, who began the day with one child, is kinda surprised during a phone call with Lois when she mentions their "sons," plural. Congrats, Dad. Your kids just multiplied when you were off being a hero.
Lois Lane dropped Superman for Lex
Any fan of Smallville has felt the pain of watching Michael Rosenbaum's Lex Luthor try and fail to be the best version of himself. And we've all wondered, what if there was a magic cure for all evildoing that could make him choose to be good? But decades before the show ever debuted, Lex fans got their wish.
In Superman's Girl Friend Lois Lane #34, Lex casually kidnaps Lois — as one tends to do on any given weekday. However, while Lex makes grandiose threats against her, the aliens on the planet Omark set the supervillain on the straight and narrow, curing him of all evildoing. He and Lois then strike up an unlikely friendship, and the reformed villain asks her to marry him. She initially declines, but after facing car trouble, she foolishly puts herself in danger so Supes will rescue her. He fails, and the former bald baddie shows up instead.
Naturally, Lois falls for her old captor, and she finally accepts his proposal. To add insult to injury, Superman acts as Lex's best man. Ouch. But Superman, ever the charmer, is more than happy to move onto his second choice, Lana Lang. Poor Lana, always coming in second.
Lois kisses Superlion
In typical fairy tales, princesses have the unique ability to turn toads into princes. The comic book version of this tale is ... weirder. In Action Comics Vol. 1 #243, Superman and Lois act out their own version of Beauty and the Beast.
Superman gets cursed by a sorceress named Circe after he rescues the witch. She slips a potion into his drink, attempting to extort him into marrying her with a promise for the cure. (Honestly, what is with the endless marriage plots in Supes' life?) He refuses her, convinced his Kryptonian makeup is impervious to her sorcery, only to find himself turning into a super lion.
Lois then proves that her love for Superman is thicker than fur, kissing him during an awkward date night. Of course, Beauty and the Beast plays out on-stage while they're attending the theater. But unlike the happy show couple, their kiss doesn't magically solve Superman's beast issue. He forlornly accepts his fate and resolves himself to hanging out at the zoo until he realizes that Circe laced her elixir with kryptonite. As a result, he's able to figure out the cure, but he lets Lois have her moment by thinking her kiss does the trick. All in all, even without a mane, the Man of Steel has the heart of a lion.
Superman punishes Lois Lane for trying to get the scoop
When you're doing a will they/won't they dance with an award-winning journalist, chances are good they're going to ask questions, especially when you spend half of your time flying in a cape. That's something not even a pair of glasses can hide. However, despite both Clark and Superman spending significant time with Lois, he still punishes her when she gets close to uncovering his secret identity. Granted, Lois' methods to unveil her counterpart's secret aren't exactly innocent, either, but at least she's just doing her job and not being intentionally sadistic.
The debut issue of Superman's Girl Friend, Lois Lane starts off on a cringey note that sets the tone for the series. The first issue follows Lois as she dons her own disguise as a successful actress to dupe Supes into agreeing to an interview. Superman, the king of disguise, is somehow offended by Lois' parallel use of deception. To teach her a lesson, the caped hero uses his Clark disguise, pretending to jump off of a building right in front of the terrified reporter. Of course, Superman assures a traumatized Lois that he saved Clark.
As far as payback goes, he doesn't exactly think this one through. Demonstrating his flying skills in front of the very person he's trying to hide from isn't winning him any genius awards. It's also pretty rude. Throughout the series, Superman continues to find new and twisted ways to torture Lois while she tries to identify him.
Superman dresses Lois up as Cinderella ... and not in the fun way
Superman really needs to work on his reward system. In Superman's Girl Friend, Lois Lane #48, Lois has the opportunity to uncover Superman's identity, as the Man of Steel recorded his secret on a tape he gave Perry White — only to be played in the event of his death. Tempted to listen prematurely, Lois eventually decides to do the right thing, and Superman overhears. He "rewards" the reporter by offering her a chance to guess his fabricated secret identity in three time periods of his choosing. As a result, the Kryptonian transforms her into Helen of Troy and Florence Nightingale, but her forced role as Cinderella takes the cake.
What seems like a fun game turns sour when Superman disguises himself as Cinderella's evil stepmother. It gets even worse when he starves the reporter, forces her to clean, mocks her appearance, and treats her like a slave.
Superman had countless potential characters to role-play, but he chooses the abusive option just to throw Lois off the scent. Given that the game was his idea to begin with, no one forced him to go to such extreme levels to hide his identity. He could've picked any time, place, and character to emulate, but he went with the option to belittle and harm Lois. Role-play is all fun and well when both parties are into it. In a demeaning role, wrapped in tattered clothes, Lois is decidedly not.
Superman marries Lois' dead body
Superman takes the whole "'til death do us part" vow a little too literally when he marries Lois' dead body in Superman's Girl Friend Lois Lane #103. The tale begins in the previous issue when Lois meets a shifty man during an exotic animal parade that the reporter is covering. After drinking the stranger's magical elixir, Lois spouts horns, a tail, and hooves. Needless to say, Clark Kent isn't happy about this, but Lois ends up in the crossfire when Superman confronts the mysterious figure masquerading as the devil.
During their fight, a wayward laser blasts off of Superman's chest, appearing to kill Lois. Of course, Superman blames himself. In a fit of despair, the Kryptonian finally admits his love for Lois and cries out wedding vows over her assumedly dead body — not exactly the romantic wedding Lois envisioned for herself. But as it turns out, Lois was never dead. The devious devil (who's actually an alien) takes her to his homeworld in the hopes of convincing Lois to marry him. She then sees the ring Superman put on her finger and demands to go home. Who would've thought that post-mortem wedding vows would save the day?
Lois and Superman turn into babies and almost get married
Dog weddings are admittedly cute, but marrying babies takes things to the next uncomfortable level. Following Lois' disturbing trend of tricking Superman into marrying her, the pair enter a Shakespearean level of comedy during Superman's Girl Friend Lois Lane #42.
After Lois snaps a picture of Superman mid-change, a car crash alters her personality, and as a result, she gives Superman a choice — marry her the next day, or she'll develop the film. Obviously, every great romance starts out with a blackmail scheme to walk down the aisle. While attempting to stall the reporter, Superman flies her to the Fortress of Solitude, but when she arrives, she spritzes herself with a dose of "rejuvenation spray" and begins de-aging.
The age difference prevents the pair from acquiring a marriage license, but that doesn't stop Lois. She sprays Superman with the serum, and they de-age in bursts. Eventually, they get the go-ahead to proceed despite looking like toddlers. But by the time the wedding rolls around, both parties are babies. Still, everyone is chill with moving ahead with the bizarre wedding until Lois and Superman can only respond with baby babble when they reach their vows. Without an "I do," the wedding is an "I don't." It's a close call, but the couple narrowly avoids having to tell their future kids the weirdest wedding story ever.
Superman wipes Lois Lane's mind with a kiss
Everyone looks forward to the supercharged romantic climax of a love story when the couple finally kisses. At first glance, it seems that Superman II provides that toe-curling moment ... until fans look a bit deeper.
First introduced in Action Comics #306, Superman demonstrates his ability to mind-wipe people with a kiss. The concept of messing with someone's memory is shady even with random bystanders, but doing it to someone you supposedly love and trust is much worse. Instead of kissing Lois (Margot Kidder) for the right reasons in the 1980 film, Superman (Christopher Reeve) uses his amnesia trick as a power move to alter Lois' memory when she figures out his secret identity.
Given that knowing Superman's secret doesn't seem to change how Lois feels about him, his actions are that much crueler (and unnecessary). If he intends to remain close with her in both forms, she'll just discover the truth all over. This is super sleuth Lois Lane we're talking about here. If she does figure it out again, chances are she'll put together the fact that Superman messed with her mind — a fact that won't exactly go over well with a woman who greatly values the truth. Superman's got a lot of explaining to do.
Joker cons Superman into killing Lois and their unborn baby
Even the darkest, most bizarre Lois and Superman plots tend to unfold in a campy manner. However, the Injustice: Gods Among Us universe ditches Superman's usual tone for a much more sinister vibe. Here, the Joker abandons his endless torture of the Dark Knight and sets his sights on Superman, poisoning the Kryptonian with hallucinations. As a result, Superman can't tell fiction from reality, and the threat he sees as Doomsday is actually Lois (who's carrying his unborn child).
As a result, Superman launches the supposed supervillain into space, unwittingly killing the two most important things in his life. Now, most comics would pull a "just kidding" stunt and retcon the plot in the next issue, but this development is here to stay — in this world, at least. In the Earth-Two alternate universe, Lois gets transformed into a robot, which may even be a fate worse than death.
Killing the love of his life sends Superman down a dark, twisted, and fascinating path. It's Superman like fans have never seen him before. While the plot stems from a great tragedy, the trajectory of evil Superman is a wild ride worth taking. He champions a totalitarian regime that obliterates freedom and justice — turning his back on everything he once held dear.