The CSI: Vegas Character You Are Based On Your Zodiac Sign
There are few narrative formulas as tried and true as that of the police procedural. A staple of television since the days when there were only three networks from which to choose, the police procedural details the investigative processes of the men and women in blue as they try to catch the ne'er-do-well of the week and bring them to justice. The detective slaps the cuffs on, drops a quick one-liner, and the credits roll as the perp is put into the back of the squad car. What's not to love?
Around the turn of the millennium, it felt like the genre had been done to death, with seemingly every possible iteration of the police procedural already sent out over the airwaves. Enter: "CSI: Crime Scene Investigation," a show that took the spotlight off the police officers and shifted it to the forensic scientists who gathered physical evidence from crime scenes. The blend of police work and lab work turned out to be a winning combination that ran on CBS for 15 seasons and spawned three different spinoff series: "CSI: Miami," "CSI: NY," and "CSI: Cyber."
By 2016, the "CSI" franchise seemed to have run its course. But in 2021, CBS announced that they were going back to where it all began: The Las Vegas Crime Lab. A sequel to the original series, "CSI: Vegas" follows a new cast of expert investigators, joined by a view familiar faces, as they use their expert powers of deduction to thwart an unknown enemy who wants to bring down the Crime Lab once and for all. Let's perform a few deductions of our own and figure out which "CSI: Vegas" character you are based on your zodiac sign!
Warning: Contains spoilers for "CSI: Vegas"
Aries (March 20-April 19): Jim Brass
If you were born between March 20 and April 19, you were born under Aries. Symbolized by the ram, Aries is a fire element, ruled by the planet Mars. Aries are known for being fearless natural leaders who dive headfirst into life. They are energetic, determined, and quick-thinking, but can also be impatient and impulsive when told to slow down or wait for others.
How fitting that the first sign of the zodiac is best represented by the first character we see on the show. Jim Brass, retired homicide captain and erstwhile Crime Lab supervisor, fully embodies the Aries trademark leadership and determination. Brash, blunt, and enjoying a quiet retirement with his pet parrot, Jim still commands respect, loyalty, and admiration from the other CSIs in the show. In fact, the devotion he engenders is so strong that in the series premiere, he convinces two old friends from his past to cut short their never-ending sea voyage on the Pacific Ocean to help figure out who tried to murder him. Despite being out of the game, other CSIs are deferential to him when in the same room because of his natural take-charge demeanor and simmering impatience with having his time wasted.
Taurus (April 19-May 20): David Hodges
Represented by the bull, anyone born from April 19 to May 20 came into this world under the earth sign Taurus. Stubborn, grounded, and logical, a Taurus takes comfort in routine and stability. They are natural homebodies who don't like to rock the boat too much and can be, fittingly, quite bull-headed when their carefully maintained world is subjected to change. Despite their stubbornness, a Taurus can be very passionate and loving with the right person.
The Crime Lab's resident Taurus is another familiar face for fans of the original show. Former CSI technician David Hodges, also retired like his former co-worker Jim Brass, is living a quiet life as an expert witness, far away from the blood and gore of the Crime Lab. He is happily married and expecting a child when he is dragged back into the world of crime and punishment, accused of falsifying evidence during his years as a crime scene technician. Hodges truly embodies the homebody role of the Taurus, reluctant to leave his wife and quiet home to return to the violent world he tried to escape. Also, his completely unpacked garage is a dead giveaway of someone stubbornly refusing to change his organizational habits.
Gemini (May 20-June 21): Chris Park
Charismatic, funny, and versatile, anybody born from May 20 to June 21 is a Gemini. This air sign, represented by the twins, is known for having large social circles and being able to adapt to a variety of situations. Despite their intelligence and perception, Gemini can sometimes be careless and have difficulty taking responsibility for their actions.
Energetic, young CSI Chris Park is a definite Gemini. A new face in the Crime Lab, Chris often jokes with his co-workers, bringing a little bit of levity and playfulness to the grim business of forensic science. Despite his rather casual attitude, he is a very intelligent investigator, often able to work by himself with confidence and aplomb. However, his laid-back approach can sometimes lead to carelessness. This happens, most notably, when he accidentally leaves a bottle of luminol at a crime scene. This same bottle is later used by a suspect to clean up a murder, leading some people at the Crime Lab to suspect that Chris might be working against them.
Cancer (June 21-July 22): Allie Rajan
The crab is the symbol for Cancers, and anybody born from June 21 to July 22 belongs to this water sign. Ruled by the moon, Cancers are known for being extremely sensitive and emotional. They can be slightly shy and reserved, but once you manage to get inside their shell, they are warm, caring, and vulnerable.
Newcomer Allie Rajan, a level II CSI in the Crime Lab, is a talented and intelligent investigator. She is eager and likable, but can also be governed by her emotions, positive or negative. In some cases, she is unable to put aside her emotional reaction and focus solely on the evidence. This can often compromise her judgment when she's on the job and cause her to miss crucial details that could catch the killers. Despite her shortcomings, when other investigators show confidence in her abilities, her confidence in herself grows, and she proves why she is a valuable addition to the Crime Lab team. She also displays some of the trademarked Cancer shyness when it comes to her offscreen relationship with her boyfriend Mark. She hints multiple times throughout the show that she might not be entirely satisfied with her partner, but because of her caring and reserved nature, doesn't do anything to change it.
Leo (July 22 to August 22): Nora Cross
This fire sign is symbolized by the lion and ruled by the sun. Born from July 22 to August 22, Leos are confident and captivating, and they enjoy working alone. They can be a little overbearing at times, but almost always have good intentions. A strong sense of honor and morality are vital to these fire signs, and despite hating being told what to do, they can be persuaded if you get them to listen.
Nora Cross is the internal affairs detective investigating several CSIs after David Hodges is accused of tampering with cases. She has a magnetic personality and is able to develop a strong rapport with even the most reserved and taciturn members of the Crime Lab — which proves useful when her alluring charm lulls her interviewees into a false sense of security before she reveals some damning piece of evidence. Devoted to maintaining the reputation and the integrity of Las Vegas law enforcement, Nora Cross is a solo operator, unwilling to accept help from anyone until two returning characters manage to persuade her to utilize the expert skills contained within the Crime Lab's walls. Despite originally appearing to be an antagonist, Nora is a deeply moral character. In her eyes, the law must be preserved and upheld, no matter what.
Virgo (August 22-September 22): Hugo Ramirez
Virgos are first and foremost perfectionists. Born between August 22 and September 22, these Mercury-ruled earth signs have a keen eye for details and can find discernible patterns in even the most random data. They are often introverted, intelligent, and incapable of suffering fools. Virgos like to feel useful and feel most useful when they can bring order to chaos.
Hugo Ramirez, the Crime Lab's resident medical examiner, is a Virgo through and through. Preferring to work in the quiet and solace of his laboratory, out of sight of most of the other CSIs, his work is nonetheless vital to the solving of cases. With an incredible mustache and dry wit, Dr. Ramirez can be a chore to partner with. He is very particular about who gets to work alongside him, and this particularity extends to his spotlessly organized workspace. Despite his sometimes prickly demeanor, he is always willing to lend an ear if a co-worker is going through a difficult time — so long as they're still able to flawlessly perform the task at hand. His job, identifying often unapparent causes of death, is the ultimate example of bringing order from chaos. This is perhaps best exemplified when he reassembles a badly burned body in a matter of hours with minimal help.
Libra (September 22-October 23): Josh Folsom
Anybody born from September 22-October 23 is a Libra. Ruled by the planet Venus and symbolized by a set of scales, Libra's personalities are a balancing act. They're both introverted and extroverted, they can be opinionated, focused, and intuitive, but also unsure of themselves, easily distracted, and limited. Compassionate, empathetic, and charming, they tend to get discouraged when the way life differs from the way they think it should be.
Josh Folsom is the handsome and flirtatious lead investigator in the Crime Lab. The second most experienced CSI, he is very intelligent, capable, and level-headed in the field. He has a knack for piecing together evidence to draw conclusions and serves as a more experienced foil to Allie Rajan when they work cases. He is very idealistic and wants to prevent others from suffering the same pain that he has. This is shown most notably in his fierce advocacy for a young boy potentially facing life in foster homes after his father is killed. Josh is always able to see both sides of a situation and analyze them fully before acting. His one notable blind spot seems to be Allie, with whom he has an increasingly flirtatious relationship throughout Season 1.
Scorpio (October 23-November 22): Anson Wix
The scorpion is the symbol for these water signs, born between October 23 and November 22. Ruled by Pluto, Scorpios are known for their complexity. They are cunning, powerful, ruthless, and discerning. They often give the impression of being able to read minds and are adept at playing people off one another. They are desperate for control, both of themselves and others, and can deceive or manipulate to maintain it.
Anson Wix is a thorn in the Crime Lab's side. A corrupt and powerful defense attorney in Las Vegas, Wix is leading the class action lawsuit against the Crime Lab following the accusations against David Hodges. At first existing on the periphery, Wix is later revealed to be the mastermind behind the plot against the Crime Lab. He is vengeful, deluded, and unafraid to go to any means to discredit the Lab's work for his own personal gain. He maintains control over those working for him through fear and manipulation and seems utterly unfazed by killing anybody who gets in the way of his ultimate goal.
Sagittarius (November 22-December 21): Bryan Roby
Birthdays that fall between November 22 and December 21 are covered by the last fire sign: Sagittarius. Symbolized by the Archer and ruled by the planet Jupiter, the Sagittarius is laser focused on self-improvement. They deeply want to become their most authentic self. They can be reckless in this pursuit of self-discovery but are idealistic, motivated, and incredibly friendly. They have an insatiable lust for life and will always jump before making sure they have a parachute.
Bryan Roby is the college-aged son of Crime Lab director Max Roby. He is charming, friendly, funny, and honorable, but often finds himself in hot water because of his impulsiveness, perhaps best exemplified by his unintentional assault of a police officer at a college party while trying to break up a fight. Bryan is preoccupied with finding his path in life, and it can't be easy when your mother is a genius forensic investigator who wants you to follow in her footsteps. Despite this pressure, Bryan is unafraid to voice his opinions to his mother — or to make choices that will lead him to do what makes him happy. His dream job, in keeping with his charm and extroverted personality, is to run his own casino. The perfect job for a Sagittarius.
Capricorn (December 21-January 20): Max Roby
The sign of the sea goat, Capricorn is responsible, dutiful, and hardworking. This earth sign is ruled by Saturn and covers anybody born from December 21 to January 20. Capricorns are pragmatic, disciplined, and hungry for respect. While they might not express emotion openly, they care deeply about family and friendships and are devoted to those that they love and care about.
Max Roby is the head of the Las Vegas Crime Lab, and it is a position she holds with calm authority. She is devoted to her job, routinely pulling all-nighters to work on cases, and dedicated to finding justice for victims of violent crime. She understands the strengths and weaknesses of everybody on her team and understands how to best utilize their talents to solve cases. Max's work life can sometimes come in between her and her son Bryan, but when he really needs her, she will drop everything to be there for him in his hour of need. Max is a strong and capable leader who is fiercely loyal to her team and will do everything in her power to help them succeed. Even when other CSIs mess up, she sees the mistake as a learning opportunity and will calmly but directly tell them how they can improve.
Aquarius (January 19-February 18): Gil Grissom
If you were born between January 19 and February 18, you were born under the sign Aquarius. An air sign governed by the ruling body Uranus, Aquarius is often thought to be the most intellectual of the zodiac signs. Esoteric, clever, and rational, Aquarius is free-spirited and often marches to the beat of their own drum. They aren't loners, but they do enjoy being different.
Yet another returning character from the original "CSI," Gil Grissom fits the Aquarius mold to a tee. An etymologist who revels in trips to body farms, creepy crawlies, and unusual facts, Grissom is clearly a very smart investigator, able to analyze and draw accurate conclusions from even the smallest bit of evidence. He has a strange sense of humor but is one of the funnier investigators on the team, always nearby if someone needs a quick dead body pun or an off-kilter observation. Despite being a bit odd, Grissom is a loyal friend, returning to Las Vegas after hearing about the attack on his old friend Jim Brass. He is the most purely rational investigator on the team, believing above all else that to solve a crime, one must simply "follow the evidence." Despite his eccentricities, Grissom is a team player and loving husband to his wife Sara Sidle.
Pisces (February 18-March 20): Sara Sidle
The final zodiac sign, covering birthdays from February 18 to March 20, Pisces is a water sign represented by the fishes. Ruled by Neptune, Pisces are known for being emotionally intelligent, imaginative, and sentimental. Their intuition and sensitivity are their greatest strengths but can also get in the way of their ability to rationally analyze situations. Despite this, Pisces are always very tuned in to the emotions of people surrounding them and have an ability to read people that can appear psychic.
The final returning character from the original show, Sara Sidle continues to be the emotional core of the crime-solving team. Like Allie Rajan, Sara can sometimes struggle to contain her emotions while on the case, which can be a blind spot but also gives her a perspective on the crimes that many others might miss. It is her emotional perception and perhaps sentimentality for the old days that make her such a passionate defender of David Hodges when he is first accused of malfeasance. Her loyalty to and trust in her old coworker eventually convinces her husband Gil Grissom to consider the possibility that Hodges was framed, and innocent of the crime for which he was accused. Sara is also a loving partner to Grissom, always there for him, supporting him, and providing him with someone to hold on to when life gets too crazy. Combined with Grissom's intellect, the two make a formidable investigative duo.