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How The Wrecking Crew From She-Hulk Episode 3 Should Really Look

Contains spoilers for "She-Hulk: Attorney at Law" Episode 3

The third episode of "She-Hulk: Attorney at Law" features everyone from Wong (Benedict Wong) aka the Sorcerer Supreme to Emily Blonsky (Tim Roth) aka The Abomination to Megan Thee literal Stallion. And yet, even with all these names and two separate legal battles, Marvel somehow managed to slip a never-before-seen villain team into the episode, too. Well, never before seen in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, anyway. Enter: the Wrecking Crew. 

As far as they've been depicted, they're just four ordinary dudes who stole some Asgardian construction equipment which, were it not for their blatant ineptitude, would put them on the same tier as Adrian Toomes (Michael Keaton) aka the Vulture from "Spider-Man: Homecoming." Unlike Toomes, however, it's immediately clear that these spectacular failures are doing someone else's dirty work. As for who they're working for, that's as yet unclear. 

So, here's the thing: the Wrecking Crew never come out and say, "hey green lady, we're the Wrecking Crew and we're gonna steal Ralph's catch phrase." So how do we really know they're the Wrecking Crew? For starters, our biggest clue is that one of them drops the name "Thunderball" while addressing one of his teammates and, hey, wouldn't luck have it that one of the Wrecking Crew's members is named Thunderball. That's almost enough to work with, but the other key piece of evidence is that the lunk who seems to be in charge is brandishing a basic, boring crowbar — something the Wrecking Crew's leader is known to wield in the comics (although that version of the crowbar is anything but boring).

The Wrecking Crew's hilariously dumb origin story

Let's start with a little back story. The Wrecking Crew is comprised of four characters — Dirk Garthwaite aka The Wrecker, Dr. Elliot Augustus Franklin aka Thunderball, Brian Philip Calusky aka Piledriver, and Henry Camp aka Bulldozer. In the comics, Dirk is a regular thug with a crowbar who accidentally burgles the Asgardian god of mischief, Loki. In doing so, Dirk ends up with some serious S-tier abilities that land him in a position to do battle with the likes of Thor Odinson. 

For whatever reason, Dirk decides to keep his crowbar after transitioning from minor thug to minor deity and, in the heat of battle, accidentally swings it into the electrified third rail of a subway track. Instead of killing him, the intense electrical current channels Dirk's newfound power into his crowbar, making it the Dollar General edition of Thor's hammer, Mjolnir, and turning Dirk into just a regular dude again. 

Obviously, Dirk loses his fight against Thor and, since most heroes have a no-kill rule, is sent to prison. His crowbar is placed elsewhere in a lockup. While doing time on Ryker's Island, Dirk meets Elliot, Brian, and Henry, with whom he allies himself. The four "friends" plan and successfully execute a jailbreak and then subsequently steal Dirk's crowbar from where the law has it stashed away. With power in hand, the crew holds the crowbar aloft in a thunderstorm, which handily zaps them. The intense electrical current channels Dirk's stolen power into the group, dividing it equally among them. In this way, they become the Wrecking Crew. Yes, it's just as ridiculous as it sounds. 

Call Edna Mode because the Wrecking Crew needs a tailor

Let's talk aesthetic because these guys never really decided on one. All four of them went in what we're going to call artistically different directions. The Wrecker, for one, looks like a dominatrix with a hyper-specific tool fetish. He's also sporting the standard green and purple color combo most of Marvel's villains wore in that era. Pretty sure it's the exact same palette that the Green Goblin started with, actually. 

Next, there's Thunderball, and he's clearly just wearing one of Doctor Octopus' old, baggy, green unitards. It's even got the yellow collar piece and everything. You're not slick, Elliot. 

Third in line, we've got Piledriver who, in fairness, went for the bold choice of crawling into the first set of workout clothes he found in his dresser. It's just a blank canvas, dude — do better. 

Finally, there's Bulldozer, who probably saw the Juggernaut fighting against the X-Men once and thought, "Yes ... this speaks to me." No doubt to avoid copyright issues, he switched out the spandex for a loose-fitting, orange onesie, but he kept the metal bondage gear, so there's that.

If it's not clear from this brief description, as well as their brief screen time in "She-Hulk: Attorney at Law" Episode 3, the Wrecking Crew isn't super great at working together. If they come back for another round, and it looks like they will, anticipate some hilarious infighting and (hopefully) an anime girl transformation sequence with a magical crowbar.