Every Indiana Jones Villain Ranked Worst To Best

Yeah, yeah, we know what you're thinking: "Who?" And nobody could blame you for asking. Chattar Lal is one of the secondary villains in "Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom," yet, despite getting a decent amount of screen time, his name has likely been forgotten by all but the most ardent "Indiana Jones" fans.

So who actually is this guy? Well, Chattar Lal is the Prime Minister of Pankot, the region of British-run India in which most of "Temple of Doom" is set. When Indiana Jones, Willie Scott, and Short Round arrive at the Pankot Palace on their quest for the stolen Sankara Stone, Lal invites them to the "Guardian of Tradition" dinner — the notoriously gross scene in which the trio and their hosts eat eyeball soup and monkey brains. It's soon revealed that Lal is a member of the fanatical Thuggee cult who stole the Sankara Stone from the village of Mayapore, and he later takes part in the sacrificial ceremony that nearly kills Willie. After losing a brief fight to Jones, Lal flees the scene, and the story ends with him still at large.

Lal is capably performed by British-Indian actor Roshan Seth, but that's about as much as can be said for the character. He's clearly supposed to serve as the "civilized" face of the movie's villains — perhaps in an attempt to emulate René Belloq, main antagonist in "Raiders" — but still winds up doing little more than waving a knife around during the temple battle. Indeed, Lal's greatest crime is simply being unremarkable. And in a franchise as remarkable as this, that's pretty much unforgivable.

A common (and largely unfair) criticism levied against "Raiders of the Lost Ark" is that Indiana Jones has no discernible impact on the plot of the movie; essentially, if you took him out of the equation, everything would unfold in much the same way. And although that isn't really true for Indy, it certainly can be said for Colonel Herman Dietrich.

Of the three main villains in "Raiders" — two of whom you'll find at the very far end of this list — Dietrich is both the least interesting and the least important. He's supposedly the commanding officer of the Nazi expedition to unearth the Ark of the Covenant, but does surprisingly little during the movie itself. Indeed, most of the actual villainy in "Raiders" is assigned to Belloq and Major Toht, while Dietrich is forced to stand in the middle ground, look sinister, and occasionally throw a melon. Perhaps the character exists because, originally, he was supposed to survive the opening of the Ark and chase down Indy and Marion in a minecart. Deprived of his big set-piece, however, he is left with basically nothing else to do.

The end result of all this is a bad guy who, while not totally unrecognizable, doesn't have much of a personality beyond that Nazi uniform, and who therefore forces you to wonder: What is he even doing here?

Rounding off the triumvirate of villainous colonels in the "Indiana Jones" franchise is Colonel Ernst Vogel, the tertiary antagonist of "Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade." Vogel is an SS officer who acts as Hitler's representative on the quest for the Holy Grail; for the most part, he's similar to Dovchenko and more or less identical to Dietrich. Vogel wins out over his compatriots, however, for a handful of reasons.

Firstly, credit must be given to actor Michael Byrne, who imbues the role with just the kind of slime and arrogance a great "Indiana Jones" villain deserves, doubtless helped by the fact that — and all apologies to Mister Byrne, here — he has the perfect face for a pulpy, cartoonish depiction of a Nazi officer. Vogel also feels like a genuine threat to the Jones', a trait most palpable in the superb and surprisingly tense zeppelin scene, which also happens to culminate in one of the very best moments in "The Last Crusade". And he even gets a great fight sequence, battling Jones atop an out-of-control tank as it hurtles towards a cliff-edge.

Perhaps his finest hour, however, comes at the behest of someone else: Henry Jones Sr., who spits out an all-time great "Indiana Jones" quote at Vogel during an interrogation. "What does the diary tell you, that it doesn't tell us?" Vogel asks. "It tells me," says Jones Sr., "that goose-stepping morons like yourself should try reading books instead of burning them." A put down for the ages — for a villain who truly deserves it.

Some of Indiana Jones' enemies are scheming industrialists. Others are vicious Nazi soldiers. There are a few bloodthirsty cultists among them too, as well as gangsters, spies, and evil scientists. And then there's Satipo.

Satipo might well be the most innocuous of all of Indy's foes, but he's also one of the most iconic. Portrayed by future "Spider-Man 2" star Alfred Molina, this is the man who guides Jones through the Temple of the Chachapoyan Warriors in the opening sequence of "Raiders of the Lost Ark." As such, he's present for some of the most famous moments in movie history, including a horrific encounter with tarantulas at the cave's entrance, Jones' unbearably tense theft of the Golden Idol, and the nail-biting escape from the temple as it comes crashing down around them. This, of course, is when Satipo gets his turn in the spotlight, turning on Jones and leaving him to die after taking the Idol for himself. Shortly after, he gets his turn in the sunlight too, becoming impaled on one of the temple's light-activated booby traps.

As far as his contribution to the greater "Indiana Jones" mythos goes, Satipo obviously isn't all that, but his role in setting the tone of "Raiders of the Lost Ark" — and the franchise as a whole — simply cannot be ignored.

The Chinese crime lord Lao Che serves as a kind of preliminary villain in "Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom." Prior to the events of the movie, he hired Jones to retrieve the remains of China's first emperor, spurring a flurry of betrayals and giving "Temple of Doom" the chance to spend five or ten minutes pretending to be a James Bond movie.

And Lao Che plays his part well. The Club Obi Wan scene is so much fun largely thanks to Roy Chiao's cackling, mustache-twirling turn as the nefarious gangster, who almost makes you wish the hunt for Nurhachi's ashes had been the actual focus of Indy's second adventure. It doesn't hurt that Lao Che is also one of the few "Indiana Jones" villains to actually beat the hero at his own game, forcing Jones out of Shanghai and making off with Nurhachi in the process.

Most of all, though, Lao Che sits high on this list because he is the source of the best joke in the entire "Indiana Jones" franchise. At the end of the Shanghai sequence, Jones, Willie, and Short Round make their escape from Lao Che's goons by climbing aboard a cargo plane. "Nice try, Lao Che!" a cocky Jones calls out, before slamming the door shut and revealing four words painted on the fuselage: "Lao Che Air Freight."

The "Indiana Jones" movies are renowned for their inventive and gruesome death scenes, and no villain is given a more inventive and gruesome end than Walter Donovan. The main antagonist in "The Last Crusade," Donovan is a wealthy businessman who is obsessed with obtaining the Grail and achieving immortality. To do so, he enlists the services of Indiana Jones; soon, however, Jones discovers that Donovan had previously hired his father for the same task and imprisoned him after Jones Sr. stumbled across Donovan's Nazi ties. From that point on, Donovan plays the part of an outright villain — and one of the series' best, to boot.

Donovan is a representation of the worst excesses of human greed, playing a role similar to Panama Hat earlier in the movie. The difference, however, is that while the latter sought wealth, the former hunts for a far more mystical prize. Indeed, Donovan's obsession with immortality drives everything he does — including shacking up with the Nazis, morals be damned — and leads the character to fully embody the more terrifying implications of avarice. (That face, incidentally, is Julian Glover's, the legendary English actor who so effortlessly delivers the combination of charm and hubris that makes Donovan so compelling.)

And then there's his ending. Forced to choose the real Holy Grail from a table of fakes, Donovan's overconfidence finally gets the better of him; he chooses "poorly," drinks from the wrong Grail, and consequently suffers one of the most horrific death scenes in cinema history.

"Kali Ma... Kali Ma... Kali Ma!" Even if you don't love "Temple of Doom," you'll know those words well. It's the incantation used by the Thuggee high priest Mola Ram during the straight-up nightmare-inducing sacrifice scenes set in the movie's eponymous temple. 

Aside from providing some of the scariest moments in the entire series, Mola Ram also stands as one of its most intimidating baddies. Ram's goal is to acquire all five of the Sankara Stones in the hopes that they will usher in the reign of the Hindu goddess of death, Kali. Allying himself with Chattar Lal (remember him?), Ram uses a form of mind control to manipulate the Maharajah of Pankot and run his cult out of the hidden temple beneath the Maharajah's palace. Later in the movie, Ram and his acolytes pursue Jones out of the temple catacombs after he interferes with their plans, but meet a grisly end when Jones cuts their rope bridge and sends them plunging to their deaths in crocodile-infested waters.

There are no "Indiana Jones" villains quite like Mola Ram. He's as intelligent and as deadly as the rest of them, sure, but what really gives Ram his shine is his penchant for sadism and unlimited ambition. Yes, Jones has faced Nazis and Soviets and gangsters, but this is a man whose crusade ends not with the acquisition of an artifact or the destruction of an enemy nation, but with the eradication of every god but Kali Ma, and the total subjugation of humanity under the yoke of the goddess of death. Basically: Satipo he ain't.

René Belloq is a captivating villain not because he's sadistic, not because he's genocidal, and not because he's hell-bent on destroying Indiana Jones. In fact, he's captivating because he's the exact opposite to Jones — the personification of adventurist archaeology gone bad — and also because he appears to be better at the job than his rival. "I am but a shadowy reflection of you," Belloq tells Jones at one point. "It would take only a nudge to make you like me. To push you out of the light."

Belloq is, of course, very much out of the light. A highly unethical and dangerous archaeologist, Belloq sells his finds to the highest bidder, often bringing him into conflict with Indiana Jones. Their rivalry reaches a head in the main plot of "Raiders," in which Belloq is hired by the Nazis to find the Ark of the Convenant and promptly eats a wandering fly.

Much like Jones, Belloq is charming, affable, and highly skilled, and he's right when he claims that he is a shadowy reflection of his rival. But the difference between them is stark nonetheless, marked by Jones' refusal to hock artifacts to private collectors, to kill in cold blood, or to join forces with evil. In the end, though, the most significant difference between them proves to be Belloq's undoing: hubris. Belloq believes he can unearth and control the power of God, while Jones understands and fears its destructive power. That sense of respect for the mysteries of the universe is what makes Indiana Jones a hero and René Belloq a villain — and it's exactly why one survives and the other does not.