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Beauty And The Beast Gets An Honest Trailer

The honest trailer for Re-Booty and the Beast– sorry, Beauty and the Beast– is here. The new video from ScreenJunkies delves into all of the way that Disney's live action remake of the animated classic is basically just a rehash of the original, while also pointing out some of the stranger details of the film's story.

"You remember the tale as old as 1991," the video begins. "Now, experience it all over again with CGI and celebrities as Disney reminds us, it's not about how you look, it's what's on the inside– of your wallet– that counts." It then goes on to point out how, unlike Disney's live-action remake of The Jungle Book, the new film does nothing to improve on the animated film, and rather just copies it exactly to "see if anyone notices or cares." Considering the film's incredible box office performance, it appears they don't. 

The movie first brings us to "the British-est part of France," where we meet Belle, "a beautiful book lover who falls in love with an ugly dude," something Emma Watson should apparently be pretty familiar with from her Harry Potter days. The video points out that Watson turned down an Oscar-winning role in La La Land for the film, but she still turned in an award-worthy performance for not laughing every time her co-star Dan Stevens came on screen in his Beast mo cap suit. 

Of course, not everything in the film is just a repeat of the original, as there are several tiny details introduced into the live-action remake, like "superfluous backstory, wandering around the woods, diversity, and the plague. Kids love the plague!" There is also, of course, Stevens' big singing moment as the Beast, which "will have you wondering if you have enough time to take a pee break." (You do.) 

"So be DIsney's guest at this timeless tale of how it's your inner beauty that matters," the video concludes. "Even though Belle is hot, the Beast is hot, the dresser is hot, the librarian is hot, and even the withered old crone turns out to be hot. Because while inner beauty is what really matters, your ugly ass is definitely a curse." 

As we re-examine everything we ever thought about Beauty and the Beast, see some Easter eggs Disney snuck into the film that you may have missed.