The Worst Thing Sterling Archer Has Ever Done On FX's Archer
Picking the single worst thing Special Agent Sterling Archer (H. Jon Benjamin), codename Duchess, has ever done is like trying to select just one option at an ice cream parlor. There are so many varieties to choose from, and each has its own particular flavor.
Archer is a shocking narcissist who frequently puts the physical and emotional wellbeing of his co-workers and loved ones in jeopardy. Usually, this is for nothing more than his own selfish need for everything to be done the way he likes it. For most TV characters, that quality alone would take the top spot. But for Archer, those are just the opening lines of his extensive biography of bad behavior.
Throughout the course of Archer's 11 seasons, fans have watched him habitually cheat on his girlfriends, destroy other people's relationships, and continuously pump lead into his poor co-worker Brett (Neal Holman). Season 12 of the series may see Archer top himself in terms of terrible deeds, but for the time being, these are the absolute worst things Archer has ever done.
Archer has a long history of mistreating the women in his life
Really, Archer's behavior toward just about any woman who has been unfortunate enough to cross his path could make the shortlist of the worst things he's ever done. But his treatment of his co-workers and friends, Pam Poovey (Amber Nash) and Cheryl Tunt (Judy Greer), feels especially worthy of a dishonorable mention.
Early in the series, Cheryl and Archer were known to occasionally hook up. Despite the fact that he was intimate with her on multiple occasions and also saw her every day at work, Archer couldn't remember Cheryl's name, and regularly called her Carol. He was also known to throw her clothing over his balcony in fits of rage and, as viewers saw in the very first episode of the series, force feed her ice cream, despite the fact that she's lactose intolerant.
Later in the series, he and Pam have their own twisted affair. While Archer enjoys hooking up with Pam, he doesn't want anyone to find out. To try and throw the others off his trail, he treats her cruelly when they are in public, often mocking and ridiculing her looks and personality. In the season 4 episode "Space Race Pt. 1," he even shoots Pam with a potentially deadly pulse rifle so that she won't reveal their secret relationship.
When it comes to the way Archer treats the people that are closest to him, however, nothing tops what he's done to poor Woodhouse (George Coe).
Woodhouse missed seeing his brother one last time because of Archer's selfishness
There is perhaps no one closer to Archer than his personal valet Woodhouse. After all, the man raised him from infancy while Mallory (Jessica Walter) was gone for work. Of course, Archer being Archer, he frequently repays Woodhouse's kindness and affection with horrific abuse. It all pales in comparison, though, to one particular incident involving Woodhouse's brother Dicky.
In the season 2 episode "Stage Two," Archer is reeling from a recent cancer diagnosis. It's reasonable to have some anxiety surrounding such a thing, but in typical Archer fashion, he acts out in a way that majorly crosses the line. During the episode, Woodhouse reveals that he's using his scant few vacation days to go on an all-expenses-paid trip to Las Vegas with his brother Dicky. Woodhouse hasn't seen Dicky in years and given their advanced age, he fears he won't have the opportunity to do so again. Using his cancer as a cudgel, Archer demands that he go on the trip in Woodhouse's place, thereby robbing the man who raised him of his last chance to spend time with his brother.
Sadly, Woodhouse's fears weren't unfounded. In the season 4 episode "Papal Chase," Archer cruelly reveals that Dicky died some time ago, and Archer didn't even let Woodhouse know so he could attend the funeral.
It's truly a despicable thing to do. And yet, it doesn't hold a candle to the single worst atrocity Archer ever committed.
Archer got three of his co-workers killed because he couldn't keep his mouth shut
Of all the repulsive things Archer has done throughout his life, none can compare to what we learn in the season 1 episode "Diversity Hire."
The episode begins with Mallory announcing that an undercover ISIS agent was killed after having their cover blown. When Lana (Aisha Tyler) asks how he was found out, we get a cutaway of the agent standing with the members of the cartel he's embedded with. The agent then gets a call from none other than Archer. Without thinking twice, Archer, who is at a bar, yells into the phone, "Talk to these chicks, alright? Tell them how we're really ISIS agents! They don't believe me!"
It's then revealed that he did the same thing to at least two other undercover agents, bringing the death toll from his attempts to pick up chicks up to three. Archer has done many wretched things in his day, but getting three of his colleagues murdered because he couldn't stop bragging about being a secret agent feels like the absolute worst of them all.