Robert Downey Jr.'s Tragic True Life Story
In 2015, Robert Downey Jr. was proclaimed the world's highest-paid actor, according to Forbes Magazine, and it was the third consecutive year he'd been given that honor. He remains one of the biggest actors in the world, mostly thanks to his career-defining performance as Iron Man in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. But his status today is a far cry from where he'd been earlier in his career, as the actor has gone through more tragic ups and downs than almost anyone in Hollywood history who lived to tell the tale.
From missing out on some of the biggest roles in the '80s to his infamous run-ins with the law and stints in rehab, Robert Downey Jr. was a man few would have predicted would wind up among the biggest stars in the business. But his most public struggles aren't the only problems that the actor has faced, as he's proven he's nearly as unstoppable as Tony Stark himself, rebounding from a series of setbacks to become one of the most popular celebrities in the world.
A childhood mired in turmoil and chaos
During Robert Downey Jr.'s childhood growing up in Greenwich Village, his parents were underground film directors, screenwriters, and actors who were immersed in the city's bohemian culture. And little Robert got to experience it all firsthand, including plenty of alcohol and drugs. "I knew that we were not like other families," the actor said in his 2022 documentary about his father, "Sr." For example, Downey Sr. gave his son his first taste of marijuana when he was just six years old.
"There was always a lot of pot and coke around," Jr. told The New Breed in 1988 (via People). "When my dad and I would do drugs together it was like him trying to express his love for me in the only way he knew how." Over the years, though, Downey Sr. has expressed regret over providing his young son with drugs but explained things a little differently. "A lot of us did things and thought it would be hypocritical to not have our kids participate in marijuana and stuff like that," Downey Sr. once said in an interview that resurfaced after his passing in 2021 (via People). "It was an idiot move on our parts, a lot of us, to share that with our children."
Sadly, that exposure led to the drug problems Downey Jr. faced later in life, something the actor discussed in "Sr." "I think we would be remiss to not [acknowledge] its effect on me."
His parents' divorce led to a divided life
After a few short years of making films with his mom and dad as a family, Robert Sr. and Elsie Ford were divorced, shattering what little normality the young Robert Downey Jr. had in his life. While Sr. and Elsie remained on good terms, the break-up tore Downey away from his mother when he chose to stay by his father's side.
When Downey Sr. relocated to California after his divorce, Downey Jr. joined him on the West Coast. It was a tumultuous time for the young actor, who began to pursue acting more seriously as he got older. When he was 16, he moved back to New York to live with his mother after dropping out of high school.
The times he spent with his mother back in New York helped him reforge his bond with her, though, which became critical years later. According to Downey, it was at his lowest point in the mid-2000s when a heartfelt phone call from his mother Elsie moved him so deeply that he gave up alcohol for good.
Drug problems followed him to Hollywood
Though Robert Downey Jr.'s relationship with drugs began at home with his father sharing substances with him as a child, his problems got worse once he made the move to Hollywood. And they exploded when he snagged his first major leading role as Julian Wells, a young man in the throes of addiction himself, in the 1987 drama "Less Than Zero."
"When I did 'Less than Zero that was right around the time I began," Downey recounted in his 2022 documentary. "It was, obviously not autobiographical for me, but certainly what was similar was 'young folks, drugs, the '80s.'" And the use of drugs on and around the set — ironic considering the film's cautionary tale — extended beyond just himself. "We were all altering our consciousnesses with substances ... I was just kind of playing a game of just wanting to self-soothe or just stay loaded rather than deal with the fact that things had gone off the tracks a little bit."
During his time on the film, Downey's drug use got out of control for the first time, as his previous bouts with alcohol and drug consumption had always been tempered. "Until that movie, I took my drugs after work and on the weekends," he told The Guardian in 2003. "That changed on 'Less Than Zero,'" he says, leading to a spiral into drug and alcohol addiction that would plague him for more than a decade and nearly end his career.
If you or anyone you know is struggling with addiction issues, help is available. Visit the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website or contact SAMHSA's National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357).
A failed attempt as a live comic star went down in infamy
In 1985, "Saturday Night Live" producer Lorne Michaels returned to the show after five years away, and Robert Downey Jr. was one of his first new hires. The 19-year-old Downey was thrilled, as he'd been looking for work after a small role in "Weird Science," with his co-star Anthony Michael Hall helping him get an audition. The problem was that Downey was awful, receiving scathing reviews on the late-night sketch comedy show.
The future Marvel superhero did manage to make it through the whole season, but he was given the pink slip when it was over. Since then, his brief "SNL" stint has become legendary, essentially the face of everything that was wrong with "Saturday Night" in that era, from poor casting and unfunny sketches to whiffing on a future megastar. In 2015, Rolling Stone even named him the worst cast member in the history of the long-running series.
Though an abject failure, Downey's time on "SNL" was a learning experience. "I learned so much in that year about what I wasn't," he told The Off Camera Show in 2019. "I was not somebody who was going to come up with a catchphrase, I was not somebody who was going to do impressions. I was somebody who was very ill-suited for rapid-fire sketch comedy."
He lost out on a pair of major movie roles early in his career
Nearly every actor in Hollywood has had a moment in their career where they've missed out on a major role. For Robert Downey Jr., his biggest misses were fairly early on, when he was a struggling young actor still trying to establish himself.
The first was the role of Duckie in the John Hughes classic "Pretty in Pink." According to star Molly Ringwald, she had wanted Downey for the role and lobbied hard for him to producers, thinking his portrayal of the character would have matched up better with the film's original ending, which had Andie and Duckie winding up together. When Jon Cryer got the role and the film was completed, though, test audiences weren't thrilled by the pairing, and the ending was rewritten to what we know today.
A couple of years later, Downey had a second chance to play a leading role in an '80s classic when he was offered the part of Lloyd Dobler in "Say Anything." But Downey passed on the film, with the role ultimately going to John Cusack, in what would become a star-making performance in his young career.
A bitter breakup because of drugs
Like any major movie star, Robert Downey Jr. has had his share of high-profile relationships. He was reportedly involved with Marisa Tomei and Calista Flockhart at different times, but one of his most public romances was with future "Sex and the City" star Sarah Jessica Parker. The duo were together for seven years beginning in 1984, but their relationship was anything but harmonious. According to Parker, who was just 19 at the time they began dating, the problems stemmed from Downey's drug use and reckless behavior.
In a 2023 interview with the New Yorker, Parker revealed that she often had to play the role of guardian to her boyfriend. "People around him would be dismissive of me, but I had given him stability and tried to create a steady heartbeat that allowed him to show up on time," Parker told the outlet. As one might imagine, playing caretaker to her partner wasn't what she wanted out of a relationship. "That made me angry and embarrassed me."
In an interview with People in 2018 she was even more candid, saying it was Downey's drug use that ended their relationship. "At a certain point, I had the courage to say, 'I'm going to walk away and I'm just going to pray that you don't die.'"
First troubles with the law
Though Robert Downey Jr. struggled with drug use and alcohol addiction all throughout his young adulthood, it wasn't until the mid-1990s that he came face to face with legal consequences. After years of keeping his substance abuse problems out of the courthouse — only receiving a stern warning after he was caught smoking pot at Disneyland — his struggles spilled into public view when he found himself arrested in June 1996.
He was coming off his starring role in 1995's "Restoration" when he was caught driving under the influence in a story that made headlines in Hollywood. As reports at the time revealed, Downey was stopped for speeding after sheriff's deputies spotted him driving erratically. After a search of his pickup truck revealed several illegal substances, the 30-year-old actor was also booked for drug possession and weapons charges, related to an unloaded handgun also found in the vehicle.
Downey was freed on bail, but he was sentenced to three years of probation and ordered to undergo periodic drug testing. A year later, he didn't make one of those court-appointed check-ins and found himself serving four months behind bars in county jail as a result.
Breaking and entering
After getting caught by police in possession of drugs and a firearm, Robert Downey Jr. got off relatively easy, but just weeks later was back in handcuffs. Downey wasn't behind the wheel this time, but one could argue the crime was more disturbing, as the actor was caught after he'd broken into a neighbor's Malibu home. Though he wasn't there to burgle, the actor was discovered asleep and under the influence of one or more substances.
Arrested for trespassing and being under the influence, Downey was released the same evening, but the fact that it came mere hours after he'd been arraigned for his previous DUI made it all the more troubling. It appeared that the incident was the result of a mistake, though, as reports suggest that the home bore a striking resemblance to Downey's own and was located in the same neighborhood — and thankfully, he didn't seem to present a danger to anyone. "He was sitting up–groggy, looking very white and gaunt," homeowner Bill Curtis said while speaking to the Los Angeles Times. "At no time was he doing anything the least bit threatening."
Downey's time in prison was an eye-opener
In the late 1990s, Robert Downey Jr. was a cautionary tale of how far a star could fall. And in 1999, after missing yet another court-ordered drug test, Downey had the book thrown at him, receiving a sentence of three years in prison. He was released after just 15 months, but the actor has often looked back at that year as the worst time in his life.
"Arguably the most dangerous place I've ever been in my life," said Downey on Dax Shepard's podcast the Armchair Expert (via People). "You could just feel the evil in the air ... It was kind of like just being in a really bad neighborhood, and there was no opportunity there; there was only threats." He likened the experience to being on an alien planet with no way back to Earth. Yet, it wasn't the end of his legal troubles, because just months after his release in 2000, he was arrested once more, this time on Thanksgiving weekend, for possession of drugs and being under the influence of narcotics, and was nabbed again by police in a Los Angeles alley.
In 2015, having been clean and sober for over a decade, California Governor Jerry Brown gave Downey an unconditional pardon for his past offenses. Though his record wasn't expunged entirely, the pardon means he once again has the right to vote, something felons lost in California until Proposition 17 was approved in 2020.
Losing his award-winning comeback gig
In the early 2000s, Robert Downey Jr.'s career was in shambles after various scandals and more than a year in prison. Some in the industry may have wondered if he could recover from the non-stop controversy, rehab stints, and arrests, even if there was never any doubt about his immense talent. But in 2000, one of TV's biggest legal dramas, "Ally McBeal," decided to roll the dice on Downey, taking the then-rare opportunity to get a big-screen star on their primetime network series.
The results were spectacular — at least at first — with Downey reinvigorating the series as the title character's new boyfriend, Larry Paul. It finally looked like Downey was going to be the big comeback story of the new millennium, and he was even nominated for an Emmy Award for his performance. Once again, though, Downey couldn't stay out of trouble, with a pair of arrests, one in late 2000 and another the following spring, both on drug-related charges.
Forced to finish the season without him, "Ally McBeal" creator David E. Kelley wasted little time in dropping Downey from the series. It was a disappointing end to what could have been a true Cinderella story, and it cratered Downey's career comeback just as it was getting started.
Coping with the death of his parents
Robert Downey Jr. has rarely held back about his difficult childhood and the problems he faced as the son of two filmmakers who had struggles with drugs and alcohol themselves. That may have only made things more of a challenge for the actor as the years passed and he faced his own problems, but it was nonetheless incredibly difficult for Downey when his mother Elsie passed away in 2014.
In reaction to her death, Downey published a moving statement about his mother's life. He talked about how Elsie had been more than just a mother, but an inspiration in cleaning himself up, as she had done years before. It could have also been losing his mother that made him take stock of his difficult relationship with his father, Robert Downey Sr., because in 2019, he embarked on a journey to document his father's life in what became the 2022 documentary, "Sr."
Released on Netflix just months after Downey Sr.'s death, the film sees the actor getting closer to his aging father, who was suffering the effects of Parkinson's disease. But the film went beyond being a simple tribute to his dad: It was also a poignant story of love and loss and the lessons learned when coming to terms with death.
His son dealt with his own addiction issues
It couldn't have been easy for Robert Downey Sr. to watch his son go through years of substance abuse knowing he'd played a part in his addictions. But Robert Downey Jr. sadly also had to play the role of father to a troubled son when his child went through similar struggles.
The son of Downey Jr. and his first wife Debra Falconer, Indio Falconer Downey, is a promising musician these days, but he got into legal trouble due to drug use in 2014. That year, Indio was arrested in Los Angeles for drug possession, which some may have feared would lead to the same kind of self-destructive behavior his father displayed for decades. This time, though, the young actor had help in the form of his famous father, Robert Downey Jr., as Debra Falconer revealed to Radar Online.
"Robert has stood by our son all the way through the 'highs and lows' and he's in a great place just now," she said in 2019. While Indio has continued to face challenges, it was reported in late 2023 that the younger Downey was celebrating 18 months of sobriety, and preparing to release his first EP in early 2024. "I feel I'm going through a transformation," he told People while promoting his upcoming release, even telling the outlet that he hopes to collaborate with his famous father one day.
RDJ's post-MCU career struggles
While Robert Downey Jr.'s first attempt at a comeback stalled after he was booted from "Ally McBeal," his next resurgence turned him into one of the biggest stars on the planet. But after a little more than a decade in the role of Tony Stark, Downey stepped away from superheroes. Unfortunately, his post-MCU career hasn't been all that he might have hoped.
His first film after "Avengers: Endgame" was "Dolittle," a reimagining of the Hugh Lofting classic about a man who can communicate with animals. It was a bomb thanks to its massive budget and was savaged by critics. It was another three years before Downey returned to theaters. In the meantime, his own production company released several new projects, but they've been hit or miss. He executive produced a new "Perry Mason" series from HBO which, while well-reviewed, was canceled after just two seasons.
He found his first major success after Iron Man by stepping into the role of Lewis Strauss in Christopher Nolan's "Oppenheimer" in 2023, a performance for which he received much critical acclaim.