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Deleted Family Guy Scenes We'll Never Get To See On TV

Pushing the boundaries of what can be said on television has seemingly always been the goal of "Family Guy." Seth MacFarlane's adult animated sitcom has been on the air since 1999, quickly becoming a contentious alternative to similar Fox programs like "The Simpsons" and "King of the Hill." Over 400 episodes and 20 seasons later, "Family Guy" maintains its reputation for cracking jokes that walk the fine line between appropriate and "I can't believe they said that."

Amid decades of telling distasteful, offensive, and sometimes repulsive jokes, Seth MacFarlane's celebrated program has forced us to rethink what deserves to be censored for television. However, there have been plenty of times when "Family Guy" went a little too far, causing someone along the line of network executives and censorship boards to say, "That's not okay."

Throughout the years, the show has had scenes cut and edited, lines rewritten, and a full episode completely banned. "Family Guy" has even survived being canceled — twice. Still, the show's writer's room never holds back and continues to deliver some of the most surprising jokes on television. If you want to discover some of the bits and scenes that were too much for general audiences, here is the list for you. The following jokes had to be cut and will likely never be shown on television again.

The dirtiest joke

In Season 8 of "Family Guy," Peter's friends tell him a joke that is so funny that he defecates in his own pants. The hilarious joke is so clever that Peter loses multiple pairs of pants. The plot of the episode follows the friends as they attempt to uncover the source of this ultimate joke, meeting lots of notable people along the way, including Bender from "Futurama," Bill Gates, and the rock group REO Speedwagon.

Interestingly, throughout the whole episode, the audience is never privy to the joke in its entirety, and only ever hears the punchline, "Your vagina is in the sink." However, those that have been lucky enough to watch the uncut version, made available on home video release, learned the first part of the joke. When heard, there is no question about why the joke was cut from television, as it is filled with profanity and inappropriate topics. Lois even calls out that the joke is too much while Peter recites it, but Peter can't resist and needs to change his pants post-punchline.

Pat Tillman

"Family Guy" often sends up real-world cultural issues for a good laugh. However, sometimes the subject matter is a little too close to home for general audiences. Case in point: when Pat Tillman became the punchline. For context, Pat Tillman was a professional football player who joined the military for service in Afghanistan. Sadly, Tillman was killed by friendly fire in 2004, which caused a political storm over soldier safety overseas.

The fruit seemed too ripe for picking for "Family Guy," which made a crack at the whole situation just a couple of years later in Season 6's "Stewie Kills Lois." In a cutaway scene, Peter has joined the military and continuously mistakes his commanding officer's orders and instead hears them as "Shoot Pat Tillman in the head." Attempting to avoid a stir, Fox opted to cut the joke. Later, the show's writers called it one of the most offensive jokes they ever told. However, Seth MacFarlane's co-writer Alec Sulkin said, "Seth ran into Pat Tillman's brother and... he loved it because it was all about how incompetent the military was."

The list

Season 6 of "Family Guy" is often considered one of the greatest the show ever had. One of the things that separated the year from all the others was a two-part special beginning with "Stewie Kills Lois" and culminating in "Lois Kills Stewie." The first half sees Stewie enact his long-awaited plans and finally assassinate his mother; in the latter episode, he begins his plans for world domination until his mother arms herself like Rambo and stops her son. However, before the final battle, there is one scene that most fans never got to see.

In the deleted scene, Stewie begins to detail what he plans to do with control of the world. Breaking out into a musical number "I've Got a Little List," a parody of the opera "The Mikado," the baby marks who he plans to execute — mostly people who irritate him slightly. While the song may have been cut mostly to save time for television limitations, there is an extreme amount of violence throughout the number. Thankfully, the uncut version of the episode was later released on DVD, including the catchy song and all of Stewie's unnecessary murders.

Meg's death

One of the most picked on and mistreated characters in all popular culture is Meg Griffin. The only daughter of the "Family Guy" main crew is shunned, mocked, or ignored at least once in nearly every episode of the series. It makes for a good laugh, although sometimes it is easy to feel bad for the teenager. Thankfully, Meg was once saved from being unabashedly killed onscreen for the sake of a good joke.

In the Season 12 episode "Chap Stewie," the Griffin baby has the ultimate temper tantrum after Peter and Chris break the television while he was trying to watch his favorite show. In an act of revenge, Stewie travels back in time in an attempt to make sure Peter and Lois never get together. However, in doing so, an alternate British Stewie is born. In a deleted scene, the variant Stewie comes back to haunt the Griffins, entering their kitchen and shooting the original Stewie. The gunshot misses, but strikes Meg in the head instead. As she slumps to the table dead, she is ignored one last time, as her family runs to the aid of Stewie, who was grazed by the bullet and may need stitches.

Chemotherapy

"Family Guy" has never shied away from mentioning or displaying illegal drugs. Such was the case when Peter Griffin's old friend Cleveland Brown made his triumphant return from starring in his own spin-off sequel "The Cleveland Show." After a temporarily successful run, the cast of the latter series returned to "Family Guy" with a special 2014 episode in Season 12 titled "He's Bla-ack!" Unfortunately, the friend's long-awaited reunion is not without conflict, as Lois and Cleveland's wife, Donna, quickly find themselves arguing.

Unwilling to end their friendship for the sake of their wives, Peter and Cleveland begin devising ways for them to meet up without being discovered. In an unaired scene, the pair finds a cottage out of town and begin gathering for some debauchery. On their first meet-up, they bring some beer and cannabis, but the more often they get together, the harder the substances get. After some significantly hard drugs, Peter finally takes things to another level by bringing chemotherapy to the cottage. The excessive use of substances and the mockery of cancer treatment proved to be too much for the network. The scene was changed to Peter posing as a police officer so he could pull over his friend and chat, which of course ends with Peter assaulting Cleveland to make the encounter look authentic.

Peter's slowness

One of the most controversial episodes released in the early years of "Family Guy" was the Season 4 episode "Petarded." In the episode, Peter takes a test to prove he is a genius, instead, the results show that he is intellectually disabled. The rest of the plot follows Peter seeing what he can get away with thanks to his condition. The synopsis alone showcases why the episode had some people questioning if it was appropriate for television, and the language used did force the broadcast censors to put in some limitations.

One deleted scene featured a musical number titled "Peter Is Slow" parodying the famous "Telephone Hour" scene from "Bye Bye Birdie." When Peter's neighbors learn about his disability, a phone chain begins to spread the word around town. According to the DVD commentary, the song uses the word "r***rded" one too many times and the entire scene had to be cut for television. It is shocking that the word was allowed to be used on television to begin with, so don't expect the scene to appear on television anytime soon.

Michael Jackson

Considering how often "Family Guy" likes to make jokes about cultural icons, it is natural that Michael Jackson would be the target of the show's mockery on more than one occasion. The King of Pop has had several appearances in the series, including showing Stewie in the musician's bed. However, there was one joke about the musical sensation that may have gone too far.

The Season 4 episode "Peter's Got Woods" centers around Peter Griffin becoming best friends with Hollywood actor James Woods. However, there is one cutaway scene that features the King of Pop holding baby Stewie over a hotel balcony. The short sequence is a reference to a real incident that once again brought up concerns of child endangerment in Michael Jackson's care. Fans finally got to see the deleted scene in a DVD bonus titled "Family Guy: Off the Cutting Room Floor." However, there has been no explanation as to why the scene was censored despite the show having said much worse things about the late Michael Jackson throughout the years.

JFK Pez dispenser

For the most part, Seth MacFarlane has been unapologetic about the humor used in his shows like "American Dad," "The Orville," and movies like "Ted." However, there are a few jokes that MacFarlane has come to regret. "There have been jokes that I would have rather we not have done," the "Family Guy" creator said on the "Out of Character with Krista Smith" talk show (via Entertainment Weekly). "The JFK Pez dispenser was something I would probably not do now."

The gag that MacFarlane is referencing goes all the way back to Season 1. It involves a child purchasing a candy dispenser featuring a bust of former President John F. Kennedy that's quickly shot by a police officer. While the scene originally aired on television in 1999, it was quickly removed and has never been shown on television again. MacFarlane's regrets also include a joke about Adrian Brody, who "got very upset with [MacFarlane] at a party about a joke ["Family Guy"] made about him." MacFarlane added, "I felt horrible, because I actually think he's a tremendously gifted actor."

Roe v. Wade

Surely some topics must be off the table for the "Family Guy" writing room, such as the most controversial Supreme Court case in recent-ish history, Roe v. Wade. The case, which was decided in 1973, became a touchpoint in the culture wars and sparked heated debate. One would hope that "Family Guy" had enough tact to avoid polarizing its fanbase for the sake of making a crack at the situation. However, the series wouldn't have its irreverent reputation of making fun of anything and everything if it didn't make some comment or joke about the contentious court case.

In the Season 12 episode "Baby Got Black," Peter mentions that there was a time when he was Roe's boyfriend. A quick cutscene ensues that puts Peter beside the woman in the middle of the Supreme Court case. When the judges announce that they have ruled in favor of Roe, Peter celebrates and tells her to "get that thing out of there," then immediately breaks up with her. It is understandable why the scene was censored from television, given the touchy circumstances.

Boston Marathon

Sometimes it's the joke that you least suspect to be censored that gets left on the cutting room floor. Season 11's "Turban Cowboy" episode had an entire plot that could have been considered too much for TV. The plot centers around Peter becoming best friends with a Muslim, only to discover later that he is a dangerous terrorist. Despite the danger of inciting racial stereotypes, the scene deleted in the episode has nothing to do with that theme.

The show aired in its entirety back in March 2013, but an unfortunate circumstance caused the entire episode to be pulled from television; it still has yet to resurface. The problem involves one of the opening scenes where Peter crashes his car into the Boston Marathon, causing mass murder. Sadly, the real-world Boston Marathon bombings occurred less than a month later. The scene, mixed with images of bombs detonating later in the episode, made it seem like the show predicted the incident. This was enough for the show to be pulled from the air and clips of the scene to be banished from YouTube.

Uncensored therapy

No matter how terrible a deleted scene may be, "Family Guy" finds a way to get it to the audience — usually through special bonuses on home-release DVDs and BluRay. However, there is one scene that was never supposed to be seen by anybody. Back in Season 2's "Road to Rhode Island," Peter and Lois are combatting their marital issues by watching a collection of couples therapy videos. Unbeknownst to Lois, the videos end with the therapist, Dr. Amanda Rebecca, stripping for the male patients.

The scene avoids anything too spicy and cuts away as the attractive doctor removes her clothes. However, there was a rumor that the studio created an X-rated version of the scene as a joke for the makers of the show. Unfortunately, the nude version somehow found its way on the internet and can still be found in some of the adult corners of the web. Understandably, the pornographic cut has never officially been released by "Family Guy," and it is guaranteed to never be shown on broadcast television.

The banned episode

Shockingly, despite all the tasteless jokes and controversial imagery, "Family Guy" has only had one episode fully banned from appearing on television. Despite the impressive run, it is easy to understand why this one episode had to get the boot.

Intended for release in Season 8, "Partial Terms of Endearment" starts with Lois agreeing to be a surrogate mother for an old friend. Unfortunately, after the parents die in an automobile accident, Peter and Lois are left with the difficult choice of what to do with the baby. Ultimately, the episode centers heavily around abortion, a highly controversial topic.

Fox decided not to air the show, and Seth MacFarlane said that the episode was "too edgy" for the network. Subsequently, Fox Entertainment president Kevin Reilly said the censorship decision came down to money, saying, "It's an extremely fragile subject matter at an extremely fragile economic time. Of all the issues, this is the one that seems to be the most of a hot button." While he admits that the episode may not be more offensive than other "Family Guy" content, they worried the topic could cause too much trouble.