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The Financial Reason The Impractical Jokers Haven't Punished Murr With Sharks

As we approach adulthood, there is an absolute lukewarm dumpster puddle of a truth that we're all forced to come to terms with: Not a lot of people in our lives are going to be punished via the application of live sharks. Regardless of how much any given colleague, boss, or surprisingly mean niece might deserve it, the hard fact is that no one is magically going to come along and drop them in a tank full of oceanic apex predators to teach them a lesson.

And unfortunately, it's not one of those "want-something-done-right-then-do-it-yourself" situations, either. The costs associated with setting up some sort of punitive shark enclosure are, tragically, prohibitive. That's not just us talking, either — it's the fat cats over at "Impractical Jokers," rolling around in their basic cable reality show money and putting out their gold leaf-wrapped cigars in our drinks. Asked by a fan why the group hadn't punished vocal shark-disliker James Murray by, and we're spitballing here, forcing him to sit in a bathtub with a reef shark and feed it cuts of salmon from his open mouth, Brian "Q" Quinn explained:

"We've tried," Quinn stated. "On the show, in order to get the bigger things done [...] we have to get insurance to approve it."

Well, that's a troublingly mature answer.

Jumping the shark would be too expensive for the Impractical Jokers

Brian Quinn elaborated on the "Impractical Jokers" post-show digital series "After Party Web Chat," where he made a crucial return to form. "There are certain things that we do on the show that, we just ignore insurance. You can get away with little things knowing that you're not gonna get killed." For examples of times when they couldn't "just ignore insurance," though, Quinn cited the episode where he fought an alligator, as well as when they stuck Joe Gatto on top of a Roosevelt Island tram car dressed as Captain Fatbelly and sent him on a journey of vertigo-inducing self-discovery.

Insurance premiums have always been the great enemy of high art — the insurance for a "Jackass Forever" skit involving a Pentecostal church and the handling of live vipers would reportedly have set the production back $5 million, necessitating a reconsideration of the gang's original plans.

However, it's nice to know that money isn't the only reason that the "Impractical Jokers" gang won't drop James Murray in a Bond villain shark tank: "Also," Quinn concluded, "you can't really hear Murray scream like a girl underwater." Fair point.