The Western Hero Are You Based On Your Zodiac Sign

The Wild West was a rooting, tooting, lawless place where a fella's life could be decided on the roll of a dice, the flick of a wrist, or meeting the wrong dude in the wrong saloon. A cowboy's life was rough and ready and revolved around cattle, whiskey, horses, more whiskey, guns, and even more whiskey. When not busy talking tough, walking tall, and practicing their thousand-yard stares in the bar-room mirror, the heroes of the West probably didn't spend an awful lot of time debating the respective merits of an Aries or Scorpio in a gun-fight. They may have been spawned from a culture that believed in manifest destiny, but Astrology probably wasn't high on their agenda. Yet as all soothsayers and crystal-ball handlers know, the cosmos doesn't discriminate — and for every cowboy there is a house of the zodiac that they call home, to tie a hammock, kick off their boots, and hang a hat in.

Which brings us nicely to the question of which Western hero most closely aligns to your personality traits. It's a big question, but the universe is a big place. There are certain cowboys in certain films who embody a certain set of traits, and if you look closely you might see a bit of yourself in them — even if you've never drawn a six-shooter in your life.

With that in mind, let's saddle, up, hit the trail, and ride into uncharted territory to find out which movie cowboy best suits your star sign; Who knows, you might just learn a bit about yourself in the process. So yippie ki-yay, and don't forget your hat.

Keeping their head when all those around are losing theirs is a point of pride with a Taurus. Bull by name and bull by nature, they are as dependent and stable as a rock. This confidence and slow-burn personality simmers nicely in the guise of Brad Pitt as Jesse James in Andrew Dominik's 2007 movie on the doomed outlaw. The Jesse of this film is a character whose tragic fate is known from the very first reel, and this lends his character a true Taurean gravitas and stoicism. James is a low-key, philosophical type of outlaw; he can be vulnerable and menacing but he's always self-contained and has the confident manner of someone who knows a lot of stuff that the rest of the world doesn't.

Like any self-respecting Taurus, the outlaw's deadly patience and habit of playing his cards close to his chest indicate that he always holds the aces and keeps one eye on the long game. A true Taurus and control freak to the end, James seemingly manipulates and embraces his death at the hands of the coward Rob Ford, because he doesn't want to give the growing number of lawmen on his trail the satisfaction of taking him dead or alive. James insists on living and dying on his terms and his fondness for robbing banks is a fine example of a Taurean commitment to take what they enjoy doing to the extreme. James's downfall is also that of many a Taurus — his greed and sensitivity to criticism.

There are sensitive souls, and then there's a Cancer. If there's a star sign which wears its heart on its sleeve and is prone to unpredictable behavior, this is it. With a heightened sensitivity to life, they are blessed with an incredible, penetrating insight into all things, but the flip side of that particular coin is an extreme susceptibility to deep and abiding sorrow that can haunt like a century-old ghost. 

This is reminiscent of Cullen Bohannan in AMC's Western epic "Hell on Wheels." The former Confederate States Army Captain is on a mission and that's to avenge the slaughter of his family during the American Civil War. Yet, what helps elevate "Hell on Wheels" above the simple formula of a revenge thriller is Bohannan's character. His violent tendencies are countered by the fact that his every word and gesture appears to be weighted in sadness and haunted by grief. The man is a Cancer to the bone.

Another aspect of Cullen that positively reeks of the cosmic crab is he's hounded by pain but finds it near impossible to confide in anyone. The Cancer wants to share, but fear of being ridiculed and allowing others to use their vulnerability against them often sees them retreat into their shell rather than lay lavishly on a therapist's couch. Pretending they're okay when they're not is very much a Cancerian trait. It can be admirable, but it can all too often lead to breakdown and burnout. Another thing you should know about Cancers is wrong them once and they'll carry a grudge for life.

There's never a crooked picture, unpolished surface, or unmade bed when a Virgo is around. A perfectionist par excellence, they are more judgmental than the harshest court — but behind that remote and cold exterior, there are good intentions. Virgos see patterns everywhere and can spot a needle in a haystack at first glance, and that sharp eye accompanies sharp shooting skills in Clint Eastwood's iconic portrayal of the so-called "Man with No Name" in Sergio Leone's 1968 masterpieces "A Fistful of Dollars," "For a Few Dollars More" and "The Good, the Bad and the Ugly."

Like Eastwood's iconic character, Virgos are renowned for their economy of words, and although usually intelligent have difficulty expressing themselves. They have their own strongly-defined sense of justice, a natural contempt for the wicked and the corrupt, and a soft spot for those in need. Virgos are great fixer-uppers, and often actively seek out chaos so they can impose their orderly stamp on proceedings. The "Man with No Name" is a perfect embodiment of the Virgo spirit. He roams across the wilderness as free as a bird, perfectly self-contained and self-sufficient, and although sympathy is not this bounty hunter's strongest suit, indirectly righting wrongs and restoring the karmic balance of the universe is.

A scorpio doesn't run with the horses — heck, they don't even run with the pack — and that's because they are typically lone wolves beholden to nothing but their own formidable, fierce will. Whereas some see all manner of terrible things in shadows and solitude, the dark, remote, hidden parts of the world are the places they call home. 

Think back to Clint Eastwood's character in "The Outlaw Josey Wales," which encapsulates every inch a venomous insect with some sting in its tail. As a quiet farmer plodding along in Missouri, Wales is forced by cruel circumstance to embrace his Scorpion totality when a band of Redlegs murder his wife and young son. It sets Wales on a bloody, brutal path that best exemplifies why you should never cross a Scorpio. Their wrath may be slow to rise, but once it does it can drown the world in blood.

Throughout the film, the character's penetrating eyes, grim disdain of a world gone wrong, and dark aura of unbridled power and menace announce his intentions. Those born under this sign are guarded types who give no quarter and ask for none in return. As anyone who has seen the film knows, Wales doesn't give much in the way of small change. A Scorpio's habit of viewing the world as a continual clash of wills is the very essence of what spurs Wales on against impossible odds.

If anyone grows old before their time, it's a Capricorn. Responsibility and duty lay heavy on their shoulders, but seeing things through, keeping a promise, and being the last stop for the buck is second nature to these old goats. 

Capricorns can be so cautious, plodding, and serious that people underestimate and dismiss their true power — a prime example being one of the greatest Western characters ever created, William Munny in Clint Eastwood's Oscar-winning "Unforgiven." Viewers of the film get an inkling of Munny's hard-drinking, hell-raising, murderous past. However, we see him as a dedicated family man and farmer striving to do what's right. His stoic, unassuming manner is frowned upon by the "Schofield Kid" (Jaimz Woolvet), who eventually persuades the former outlaw to pick up his guns in search of a bounty on a low-life who disfigured a prostitute. Yet, Munny's persona is merely a clever Capricorn tactic.

As a true goat of the zodiac, Munny is no braggart, he's a man of few words and lets his actions speak for themselves. At the crucial moment, it's Munny, not the Schofield Kid who has the cool, calm, and collected nature of the true Capricorn to hold his nerve and deliver the goods when needed. Other characters in the "Unforgiven," such as Little Bill (Gene Hackman) and English Bob (Richard Harris) are flamboyant, larger than life types who talk a good talk — but when it comes to the crunch, it's only Munny who walks out of the saloon alive. Why? Because he's disciplined, deliberate, keeps his own counsel, and makes good on his promises. In short, a typical Capricorn.

Pisces is a strange, elusive little fish who swims alone in uncharted waters. A dreamer, a romantic, an emotional sponge, they stand apart and refuse to budge.

This sounds like Marshall Will Kane in Fred Zinnemann's 1952 classic "High Noon," inarguably one of the most beloved characters in cinematic history. After all, it takes a certain caliber of individual to delay his honeymoon and stay in town alone to face down a cold-blooded killer and his gang arriving on the noon train; it takes a Pisces. 

Played heroically by Gary Cooper in his signature role, Kane makes a stand against the murderous Frank Miller (Ian MacDonald) and his gang, governed absolutely by the Piscesean ideals of love and honor.

As the minutes tick by and the man he sent to prison years earlier crawls ever closer, the townsfolk urge Kane to turn tail and run. But he's not the running kind. 

As a Pisces, Kane holds justice, honor, integrity, duty, love, and the dream of a better world in higher regard than he does his own life. He's a romantic prepared to take up guns in the name of all that makes life worth living. He knows not what fate awaits, but knows that facing a man who wants his blood is far better than "lying a craven coward in his grave." Kane poignantly proves that although a Pisces is a dreamer by nature, dreams can change the world.