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The Worst Things Sonic Has Ever Done

Sonic the Hedgehog is a lovable scamp who enjoys collecting rings, eating chili dogs, and battling the evil Dr. Robotnik. Sure, he bends the rules from time to time and loves to crack a joke or two, but he's always the hero. Or is he? Sometimes, deliberate or not, Sonic winds up as the villain in someone's story. Darkness lurks in all of us, and this beloved video game icon is no exception. That's the duality of hedgehog.

Perhaps he should go a little less fast from time to time. Maybe if he slowed down, he could take a long, serious look in the mirror and take stock of the impact he has on the world. We've plumbed the depths of the Sonic the Hedgehog canon, from his games and comics to his recent live action blockbuster film, and unearthed his many crimes and misdemeanors. What's that smell? It's not chili dogs, Sonic. It's accountability.

Accidentally erasing his children from existence

Archie's Sonic the Hedgehog comics are dark. In the "Light Mobius" arc, Sonic enters Eggman's old Talchyon Chamber in an attempt to go back in time and solve a problem endangering the people of Mobius. Instead, Sonic irrevocably alters the timeline, changing the future. His time travel undoes his marriage to Sally, leaving her in the hands of the corrupt King Shadow, and erases his children, Sonia and Manik, from existence.

He does take it pretty hard, depicted in one panel lying in the gutter as a shell of the hog he once was and weeping to a grieving Tails and Lara-Su, but that doesn't un-erase those kids! Of course, he eventually reunites with his wife Queen Sally and the two start a new family in this altered timeline. So, he gets another chance with a brand new version of the children he wiped off the face of the earth. Yay?

Killing hundreds of people with a city-wide blackout

Okay fine, we don't see any bodies onscreen. But the electromagnetic pulse caused by Sonic in the live action film wipes out the power of an entire city! There's no way it doesn't have consequences. Movie nights ruined, interrupted cooking of the very chili dogs Sonic claims to love, and yes, probably more than a few deaths.

Several online users speculated about the death toll of the blue blur's blackout (blueout?), with one industrious Reddit user by the name of Kroooooooo calculating approximately how many babies Sonic's thoughtless actions might have killed. According to Kroooooooo, based on neonatal medical statistics and birth rates in the Pacific Northwest, there would be approximately 491 babies relying on incubators and other neonatal treatment in the radius of the hedgehog-caused power outage. That's potentially nearly 500 babies he might have killed. How could you, Sonic?

Constant mistreatment of Tails

Oh, Tails. Dear, sweet Tails. You don't deserve anything this hedgehog has done to you. Sonic has always been a bit of a player, stringing Amy along again and again (and don't forget his history of seducing human women), but in issue #155 of Archie's Sonic comics, he takes his philandering ways too far. Sonic kisses Fiona Fox behind a bush, knowing that Tails has a crush on her. Tails catches them in the act, and is rightfully devastated at this massive betrayal by someone he thought was a friend. Sonic, you absolute cad. It didn't end there, either — not only did Sonic break his friend's dear little heart, he also drove him to a life of crime.

In issue #170, Tails' parents are thrown in jail by the government, the very same monarchy that Sonic's family has been participating in for years. Their crime? Attempting to bring democracy to the people and show them that monarchy is not the only way. When Sonic attempts to stop Tails from freeing them, Tails resorts to busting them out of jail and turning on Sonic. Tails made it very clear during their confrontation that it was Sonic's mistreatment of him over the years that has caused him to build up a lingering sense of resentment, and finally snap. Poor, sweet Tails could only be pushed too far before he would break.

Interspecies weirdness

Sonic kissed a human woman! Sorry, it's just hard to talk about this and keep a level head. Sega's 2006 "Sonic the Hedgehog" game has plenty of problems, with a critically reviled level design and one of the lowest Metascores in Sonic history, but its greatest sin is making us all look at Sonic the Hedgehog locking lips with a real human woman. Well, an animated human woman, but you get the point. 

Where is Amy Rose? Where is Sally? Nowhere to be found, as the audience is forced to watch Sonic's clunky romantic storyline with Princess Elise. At the story's climactic moment when all seems lost and Sonic lies dead on the ground (this game also kills Sonic for a bit, it's a whole thing) Princess Elise saves the day by ... kissing a hedgehog.

By the way, "Sonic" 2006 isn't even the first time our blue hero has entered a romantic entanglement with a human woman. Early plans for the first Sonic game featured a blonde woman in a red dress named Madonna, who was intended to be Sonic's girlfriend. She was described as a "male fantasy" who would "chase Sonic around." Madonna was scrapped from the eventual game, but the fact that it was ever a possibility is enough to give us the willies.

Participating in monarchy (and not caring about his job, either)

In the "Mobius 25 Years Later" storyline of the Archie comics, Sonic marries Princess Sally and becomes King of an entire planet. This unsettlingly quick rise to such a massive amount of power happens after an inevitable falling out with Tails. While king, Sonic pushes away most of his friends, becoming distant toward his former partners in heroism. Heavy is the hedgehog head that wears the crown, and it quickly becomes apparent that Sonic is not up to the task. 

Does he use his newfound authority to provide the people with unlimited chili dogs or, you know, healthcare? No, he just mopes around and complains about being bored. Sally attributes his bad attitude to a combination of a midlife crisis and a lack of experience in politics, but the people of Mobius don't stop suffering just because Sonic's never taken a civics class in his life. Besides, if he was really that bored, maybe he could have tried to instate a democratic government and retire this archaic power structure or something. But complaining a bunch while lounging around your palace works, too.

Killing his father

Sure, it was an alternate universe version of his father, but that doesn't make it okay! In the "Sonic Super Special" #12 story "Zone Wars: Giant Robotno," Sonic is teleported to an alternate reality, or "zone," in order to help combat a serious threat. In this zone, everything Sonic knows to be true is turned on its head. Here, Sonic partners with an alternate, good version of Dr. Robotnik, named Dr. J. Kintobor, in order to help save the people of Kintopolis. 

The people are under siege by mutated versions of Sonic's friends and family, created when the city attempted to harness the power of a split chaos emerald and tested it on the population of Knothole Island. Armed with a massive mech called the Giant Robotno, Sonic must take out each of his loved ones. While battling this zone's version of his father, Jules the Hedgehog, Sonic rips the chaos emerald out of his chest and renders his own dad a lifeless husk.

Could solve the energy crisis, but chooses not to

In this case, it's less about the terrible thing that Sonic did and more about the good thing he chooses not to do. According to the 2020 live action film, a single one of Sonic's quills possesses nearly limitless energy. When Dr. Robotnik analyzes one of the quills, he finds enough electrical energy to power a hovercraft and match Sonic's formerly unbeatable racing speed. 

The average hedgehog has between 3,000 and 5,000 quills, and just one was enough for all of that. Sonic can outrun any potential threat, so he's not exactly using his quills to protect himself from predators. Why can't he spare a few hundred quills to power a handful of major cities? Or even the entire world? Every day, Sonic wakes up with the solution to clean, sustainable energy growing out of his head, but chooses not to share it. Just a few of his quills and we could end our dependence on fossil fuels. Come on, Sonic. The oceans are rising and you're just going to lay back, ignore it, and keep collecting those Hollywood checks? Selfish.

Sonic is a bad boyfriend

Sonic is a busy guy, we get it — he's got races to win and villains to defeat. But that's no excuse for mistreating your girlfriend and keeping her waiting for you without so much as a text! In Episode 42 of the "Sonic X" animated series, "A Date to Forget," Sonic stands up Amy Rose when he double books himself for a race with Sam. You'd think someone capable of breaking the sound barrier would be better at managing his own schedule. 

Throughout the episode, Amy laments Sonic's emotional neglect of her, and his inability to commit to their relationship. At the end of the episode, when Sonic finally shows his face, does he apologize? Does he treat Amy Rose to a night on the town or at least a steak dinner (or the acceptable hedgehog equivalent)? No, he dodges a hug from Amy and then ignores her to race with Sam. With a guy like this, it's a wonder she doesn't just pack it in and give Shadow a call.

Left Longclaw behind to die (or worse)

In the live-action film, Longclaw the Owl is Sonic's primary guardian on his home planet. She is the last of her kind, a noble race of owl warriors who protect the world from danger. She taught Sonic everything he knows, and he describes her as his "Obi-Wan Kenobi, if Obi-Wan Kenobi had a beak and ate mice." When a gang of echidnas chase Sonic down in an attempt to steal his power, Longclaw gives him a bag of his iconic rings, which he can use to travel between worlds. As she sends him to earth, she tells Sonic to "never stop running," and stays behind to fight the echidnas.

Then, once he gets to earth, Sonic immediately stops running. He stays in the first place he lands, and remains there for ten years. If he was going to immediately disobey Longclaw's instructions, he could have used one of those rings to go back for the only family he's ever known. But Sonic never goes back for Longclaw, leaving her to be killed, or worse, tortured viciously by the band of echidnas in an attempt to learn his location. She deserves better after all that hard work. Justice for Longclaw!

Massive property damage

Sonic spends the majority of his 2020 film directly and indirectly causing millions of dollars in property damage. Not even counting the massive power outage he triggers, he's responsible for car wrecks, destroyed buildings, and blocks and blocks of decimated city streets. His chase battle with Dr. Robotnik leaves a trail of destruction in his wake through San Francisco, France, China, Egypt, and the poor, innocent town of Green Hills. He should be sued by Green Hills, not shielded from all responsibility with a government coverup.

Sure, it makes for an entertaining movie, but think of the casualties. Their infrastructure is likely permanently damaged, all because this wise-cracking rodent had to get himself into hijinks. Not only that, but he gets an innocent man labeled a domestic terrorist by pulling him into the crossfire. Sure, Tom is eventually cleared of that accusation, but false news reports don't just disappear from the public consciousness. Tom is likely going to be followed by the consequences of Sonic's carelessness for the rest of his life.

Stink up a shared hotel room

Sonic has done a lot of terrible things. He's wreaked emotional havoc on Amy Rose, he's chipped away at Tails' sense of self-worth, he's killed his father and erased his own children, but this is just too much. In the 2020 live action film, Sonic has the unmitigated gall to fart up a perfectly good hotel room with chili dog gas, and then laugh about it. Right to the face of a man whose life he uprooted and whose sense of reality he changed forever. Not only is it a party foul and a breach of hotel room etiquette, it's practically chemical warfare.

Of course, Sonic has done plenty of good over the course of his career, too. He's saved the world, he's looked out for his friends, and he's given Jim Carrey a return to the silver screen. But we have to acknowledge the bad with the good, or we lose the complete picture of the hedgehog — not as a symbol or a Sega mascot, but as a man. We can forgive Sonic, but we must never forget.