Breaking Bad's Laura Fraser Channeled The Darkest Part Of Herself To Play Lydia

"Breaking Bad" is full of characters who do evil things, from the protagonist himself, Walter White (Bryan Cranston), to one of the show's primary antagonists Gus Fring (Giancarlo Esposito). But outside of the obvious answers, one of the evilest characters is someone you may least expect when first meeting her: Lydia Rodarte-Quayle, a long-time business partner of Gus, played by Scottish actress Laura Fraser. 

For one, after Gus's death, she ruthlessly ordered the deaths of eleven men in custody who could possibly connect her to Gus and Mike Ehrmantraut (Jonathan Banks) — but of course, the latter outsmarted her. Regardless, it's safe to say that Lydia's death — caused by ricin-infused stevia, which she always has to put in her tea — is one of the most satisfying.

But what does it take to play Lydia, a deeply neurotic yet truly evil character? According to Fraser, finding the darkest parts of herself took a lot of introspection. Once she faced her own darkness, she was able to channel it into Lydia. Fraser told CBS News in 2013, "I know that I am capable of hideous feats, and I know I've been aware of horrible thoughts that have crossed my mind." However, there is a major difference between Fraser and Lydia: Lydia actually acts on her horrible thoughts.

Fraser bundled up her inner demons to create Lydia

Speaking to CBS News, Laura Fraser admitted to being able to tap into her own dark thoughts but was quick to make it clear that, unlike Lydia Rodarte-Quayle, she would never act on them.

Fraser said, "As Laura I would never carry these thoughts out, but I'm aware that on the inside of human beings that we have the potential for incredible, disgusting, hideous behavior. And hopefully, we'd never act on it, but some people do. So I take all my anger, and all my hate, and my hideous secret thoughts and bundle them up and there's Lydia."

Further, Fraser imagined what Lydia's backstory must have been in order for her to turn into the evil character that she is — Fraser speculated that she had an unhappy childhood and was abandoned in some way when she was young. Fraser continued, "And that was the start of her loneliness and alienation and one reason why she is who she is. It's hysterical that she wants absolute purity in something she's digesting [like her choice in zero calorie sweeteners], and yet she can order a massacre."