The most terrible things the cast of Jackass has ever done

The Jackass TV show and movies were three things: Skateboarding, stunts, and pranks. And while the skateboarding and stunts each had their own level of physical risk, nothing really compares to the psychological (and sometimes physical) trauma inflicted by the cast's incessant prank war. Bam Margera summed up the atmosphere best in Maxim's "Oral History of Jackass" when he said, "If you're on the set, you're gonna get messed with, whether you're cast or crew. I feel so unsafe. Full-blown paranoia. If you're tired, you can't even sleep, because you'll definitely get stun-gunned or peed on. I'm sure I'll be in a wheelchair by the time I'm 40, if I even make it there." With that sentiment in mind, here are the most terrible pranks the Jackass crew ever pulled.

Terror Taxi

This is a big one, because it was the most elaborate prank of Jackass Number Two, and probably the entire franchise. Also, it's messed up on multiple levels. First, the guys convinced Ehren "Danger" McGhehey to dress up like a suicide bomber in order to trick a cab driver into thinking he was about to blow up a plane. As if that's not crazy enough, they all shaved their pubic hair to contribute to the "costume beard" which was then glued to a clueless McGhehey's face. Finally, they arranged for the cab driver to be played by actor and director Jay Chandrasekhar, who proceeded to turn the tables on McGhehey by pulling a gun, stuffing him in the trunk of the cab, and pretending to murder Bam Margera. It was a triple prank that even had a final payoff when the guys revealed to McGhehey that one of his "beard donors" actually had crabs. Absolutely horrible.

Snake Pit

It's a near impossibility to turn Bam Margera into a sympathetic character, but it happened for a fleeting moment in Jackass 3D when the guys tricked him into falling into a snake pit. Capitalizing on Margera's well-known, paralyzing phobia, the crew set him up to tumble into an 11-foot pit full of phony snakes, then laughed as Margera, near tears, struggled to free himself. Of course, it couldn't just end there, so naturally, the guys hired a snake handler to then dump real snakes all over Margera, triggering what appeared to be a full-blown panic attack. "I learned not to tell [director Jeff] Tremaine or Knoxville or anybody what you're afraid of," he later told Rolling Stone.

They've punched each other's testicles a ton of times

We previously mentioned that the Jackass franchise consists of three things, but if there would be a fourth, it would have to be "nut shots," which, for the layperson, is when someone taps, punches, kicks, or strikes with an object the crotch of an unsuspecting victim. This game became such an ever-present occurrence that they even shot a huge segment on creating elaborate "nut shots" in Jackass 3.5.  The result was basically a perversion of the classic Jordan v. Bird "nothin' but net" commercials, except in this case it was nothin' but n…you get the idea.

The time Bam filled his parents' house with fireworks

Bam Margera's parents, Phil and April Margera, have been his perennial prank victims since the beginning of Jackass—and before it CKY, the Margera-created skate videos that partially inspired the show and movies. In a classic prank on Phil and April, who somehow have the patience of concrete, Margera set off fireworks in their bedroom while they were sleeping. And because every great Jackass prank has to top itself, he went for the twofer by placing more fireworks in Phil's van, which went off just as he was headed to work in the wee hours of the morning. How Bam was never dropped off at an orphanage, we will never know. Speaking of which…

The time Bam attacked his dad on the toilet

Bam once hid a camera in Phil's bathroom, then waited for him to come in and settle on the john before bursting in, punching the crap out of him, and tearing his shirt off. Had this occurred in literally any other setting, it would probably be the basis for more than a few criminal charges. In fact, we're pretty sure if Phil wanted to have Bam arrested for this attack on the porcelain throne, he would have been well within his legal rights.

The time Bam put a live alligator in his mom's kitchen

Yep, we're still talking about awful ways Bam Margera has pranked his parents. This time, it's the old "live alligator in the kitchen" trick from the original Jackass movie that had his mother screaming, "That is the scariest f***ing thing I ever saw in my whole life!" before literally barricading herself in her laundry room, yelling "I'm scared to death…is it real?! Is that thing real?!" It's hilarious because Bam Margera made his mother feel like she was about to die. Get it?

Throughout the movies Bam Margera basically surprise peed on the whole crew

Right now, you may be thinking, "Wait, what is 'surprise peeing?'" And if we're being honest, you're already putting way too much thought into what was literally just Bam Margera sneaking up behind his friends, family, and co-workers, and urinating on them. Not only does he urinate on his unwitting victims, he usually does it on either their face or head, making an already awful thing infinitely more awful.

But to Margera, this is the height of hilarity. He said as much to Maxim in their "Oral History of Jackass" when he gleefully declared, "It's the first time anybody has put a movie out that's 3D that isn't, like, Avatar or Clash of the Titans. Instead, you're going to see my d*** sneaking up on Chris Pontius while he's sleeping, and then all of a sudden you'll see a yellow p*** stream coming out of the screen, and you'll realize it's my d*** p***ing on Pontius."

You can watch a compilation video here if you're so inclined, but be warned: It's super NSFW, as in "features a ton of Bam Margera junk NSFW."

The Rocky

You know how in the Rocky movies, the actors don't actually punch each other's faces, because that's dangerous and would have likely led to awful injuries? Well, imagine if they did, and to make things even more interesting, one of them didn't even know they were in a fight! That's the entire concept of Bam Margera's prank "The Rocky," in which he tosses water in someone's face with one hand, then when they look away, he uses his other hand, clad in a boxing glove, to smash them hard in the unsuspecting kisser. It's a blast for everyone involved, except maybe the person getting blasted in the face. What's funnier than possibly giving your friends concussions, and definitely breaking one of their noses?

The time Bam set a 'gorilla' loose in April and Phil's hotel room

Did you think we were done describing ways in which Bam Margera terrorized his poor parents? Nope, there's more. This time, it was for Jackass 3D. The crew dressed Chris Pontius up as a gorilla and snuck him into April and Phil's hotel room; when they arrived, Pontius went nuts, smashing up the room, leaving April once again fleeing in mortal fear—which is kind of the theme of the parental pranks at this point. Phil, on the other hand, remained behind—not to give his wife a better chance at escaping, but because he had to go to the bathroom so bad, he decided to risk his chances on the toilet while what he thought was a real gorilla tore apart the room. Did he literally have the crap scared out of him, or has decades of dealing with Bam's shenanigans essentially shredded this man's digestive system? Perhaps we'll never know. (We are, for the record, totally okay with never knowing.)

The time Bam and Ryan Dunn messed with Johnny Knoxville's sunscreen

During a screening for Jackass 3D, Bam and Ryan Dunn saved a special surprise for Johnny Knoxville by revealing that they'd added a special ingredient to his prescription sunscreen: horse semen. And of course, they recorded video of themselves using a turkey baster to add a generous amount of the stuff to Knoxville's lotion bottle, which he incidentally used for his face, no less. "They got me," the amazingly good sport, Knoxville, said, adding, "I knew one day the consistency of my sunscreen had changed. It got super stringy. Super stringy, and I just thought it got so hot in the car, but no, it wasn't because of the heat."

The child beauty pageant stripper sketch from Bad Grandpa

Bad Grandpa was basically an extended version of the old man sketches from Jackass, and while the entire thing was full of crazy pranks played on the unsuspecting public at the hands of Knoxville's elderly alter ego Irving Zisman and his grandson Billy, the beauty pageant prank has to be the craziest. The production team went to great lengths to nail the scene, hiring a professional choreographer and a veteran pageant mom to prep Jackson Nicoll, the actor who played Billy. Admittedly, the whole thing was a blatant ripoff of Little Miss Sunshine, but it was completely worth it for the array of horrified reaction shots of the other pageant parents.

Beehive Limo

The Beehive Limo prank had it all: A double-cross, extreme physical pain, innocent bystanders who got victimized, and the possibility that someone might crap in their pants. It was the perfect setup when Bam Margera and Johnny Knoxville locked Ryan Dunn, Wee Man, Steve-O, and Dave England in a limo, then dumped bees into the sunroof. England framed the situation perfectly just before the bees' entry by commenting that he was sick to his stomach and was worried about making it to a bathroom. Shots of cameraman Rick Kosick and the limo driver running away, swearing and swatting bees off of themselves, place the perfect bow on the prank, encapsulating Margera's previously mentioned warning that, indeed, no one is ever safe.

Steve-O's used condom prank

Though the Jackass empire has been on pause for years, Steve-O has gone on to many other ventures, one of which is his YouTube channel. The clown college graduate's video feed is basically just his Jackass solo project, and features him doing—you guessed it—stunts, pranks, and funny sketches. Though his pranks are admittedly not as crazy as some of the Jackass crew's, Steve-O is still not afraid to inflict himself on the general public in the service of a good gag.

The above video features Steve-O posing for pictures with fans when all of a sudden he pulls out what appears to be a used condom—it's filled with fabric softener, by the way—and waves it in their faces. It's not really a great prank, but it is remarkable to see the number of people who react pretty blithely to what should be a truly horrifying experience.

Steve-O's golden shower prank

Remember Bam Margera peeing on virtually the entire cast and crew of Jackass? Well, Steve-O must have loved the concept—except without all the biohazard and potential criminal penalties—because he basically replicated it on a public beach, but with water and a prosthetic member. The resulting video is another testament to humanity in the sense that not a single person reacts with violence after seemingly being peed on by a stranger.

Steve-O's fake homeless guy beatdown prank

Here again, Steve-O puts himself, and to a larger degree, his accomplices, potentially in harm's way when he pretends to be a homeless guy on the street being assaulted by said accomplices. It's not particularly well-executed or funny, and it's basically an exact copy of ABC's What Would You Do? The difference is the ABC show is presented for social commentary, and doesn't allow for potentially explosive situations in which people could actually get hurt. Steve-O's prank, on the other hand, quite literally results in a physical altercation every time before it's revealed. How could he possibly know that it wouldn't have turned catastrophic for himself or the good samaritans thinking they were intervening on an assault?

The entire 'Fort Knoxville' episode of Viva La Bam

Johnny Knoxville's guest appearance on the Jackass spinoff Viva La Bam was nothing short of an all-out prank war. Throughout the 22 minutes of screentime, Margera, Dunn, and Knoxville relentlessly prank each other until they've each had a vehicle completely destroyed, lost thousands of dollars, and—of course—suffered physical harm. The episode ends with Knoxville literally heading off to get on a plane, covered in green spray paint, having just taken a "nut shot" from Dunn. "It's never gonna end," April Margera laments as the credits roll. No, April. No, it is not.